• I wonder if a similar type of thing still happens a lot to gay and bi folks? Coming out, getting pushed back into the closet by family and society writ large, then probably eventually coming out again later?

    oh probably yeah. to a lesser extent i think there’s also an increasing acceptance of sexuality as a non-rigid state of being, where sometimes your understanding and labeling of it change which can explain parts of this.

    • Yeah, that too for sure. Gender also is starting to be viewed in a less rigid way, and as something that can sometimes change or be described differently at different times, similarly.

      I’m ace but not aro, so I never know quite what to do with the usual sexuality labels because they treat sexual and romantic attraction as the same thing. If you don’t experience one of those types of attraction, or if your romantic and sexual attraction point in different directions, the usual labels alone don’t really suffice to describe that. Even ‘asexual’ is often automatically assumed to mean ‘aromantic’ too.

      • I think we will need a period of adjustment where we untangle all of that terminology that implies multiple things at the same time or covers multiple situations. Asexual as you say but also terms like heterosexual, homosexual, straight, gay, lesbian, trans being used in contexts where trans man/woman would be more appropriate. So much of it seems to cover overly simplistic subsets of the actual reality or is imprecise or based on an outdated understanding.