• Is the alternative that we all rent/buy (?) apartments? That sounds awful to me. I’ve lived in apartments my entire life and it is not pleasant due to the large amount of people that absolutely fucking suck. I would love to put some space between myself and these assholes. Ideally, I’d like to not really have neighbors at all after my lifetime of experiences.

    • Whenever people say this, my first response is: you should support building mixed use/mixed density.

      You would have an easier time affording a single family home if there were a couple of duplexes, quad plexes, and low rise apartments around, with some small shops in the ground level.

      Fewer people competing for the same single family homes and close access to bodegas and bistros. Easier time finding babysitters and dog walkers too.

      We don’t all have to love like Manhattan. Most of the nicest neighborhood in America are mixed density.

    • I used to think apartments sucked until I lived in a concrete and brick unit. It was amazing how quiet they were. The concrete walls blocked out all noise of my neighbors and traffic. I made some good friends in the units next to mine and those were honestly 2 of the best years of my life. I miss living like that

      • That sounds like a dream. Just the other night, the chick across the hall kicked her dude out after they argued in the hall for three hours. I had to listen to him stomp back and forth until 4am and knock everytime to be let back in a he collected his shit. Fucking trashy motherfuckers.

    • I’ve lived in NYC for ~15 years, in apartments, and I almost never hear neighbors. Nor have any of my friends complained about loud neighbors often. Problems with neighbors and noise is not an inherent property of apartments.

        • Maybe NYC tends to have better built apartments? I’ve only lived here for any length of time. And I haven’t been in fancy exclusively apartments.

          You may have bad luck. You may also have lower tolerance. Sometimes I hear my neighbor coming or going, but it’s unremarkable. It’s not loud or disupritve. But If I absolutely hated any reminder that other people exist, it would be a problem.

          • I’m not talking about basic shit when I talk about loud people, read my list from another comment. Loud arguments, fighting, shooting, etc. Not to mention the bodily fluids left on and around buildings from tenants and their pets. Idk where this idea that shitty people are non existent comes from, but it is a beautiful fantasy.

              • It might a difference in income or cultures where we’ve lived, though I feel I’ve had a balance and a mixture of issues. These aren’t all at once, usually. There are just people who don’t give a fuck about how their behavior affects those around them and I’d like to reduce my chances of encountering them, personally.

    • Is the alternative that we all rent/buy (?) apartments?

      No — duplexes/triplexes/etc. exist. And single-family housing does exist in mixed zoning areas. An SFH next to a duplex next to an apartment building is common in my city. However, in this case, the “back yard” is probably enough for a small garden and a bbq, but not a large lawn…which is fine, because there are parks in walking distance.

      Ideally, I’d like to not really have neighbors at all after my lifetime of experiences.

      Then city and suburbs aren’t really for you, and it sounds like something very rural would suit you, and those around you, better.

      • I like how the assumption at the end is that I’m somehow an issue for those around me. I never stated that I, in turn, cause problems for the assholes around me. One thing I know about assholes is that they only escalate, so it is best to disengage if possible. But i suppose you’re right; people who are obnoxiously loud at all hours, run/stomp around, yell/scream at each other, fight, shoot, allow their animals to urinate/deficate anywhere, urinate/deficate anywhere themselves, have loud ass animals, park vehicles just anywhere, have loud ass vehicles, etc. are probably saints, and I’m just a menace to society.

        • I really don’t see how you got that assumption at the end. It more seems like the commenter above is saying that if you would benefit from living in a rural area because there is less people and less possibilities to encounter nuisances, and that it would also be better for those people who are nuisances to also live in rural locations cause they would bother less people.

          I think its also worth mentioning that with the way housing costs, and availability for utilities is these days, not a lot of people have as much freedom to live in a space they find 100% perfect. Like i love living in urban areas, but some cities design streets so poorly that people are freely able to speed loud cars down quiet residential roads. So, we either gotta get involved in our community we find ourselves in to make the changes we want, hope someone else does it, put up with it, or pack our bags and go somewhere else.

        • “if you meet one asshole, you met one asshole. If everyone you meet is an asshole, you’re the asshole.”

          We don’t know you, but if you dislike everyone you have ever lived near or known enough to not want neighbors then you might be the common thread. Maybe you brought the worst out in people or failed to bring out any good. But who knows, maybe you were just unlucky in the people you have met

          • That movie quote isn’t clever or original, especially out of context. I didn’t “meet” these people or even interact with them. We simply existed within the vicinity of each other, and they were people that had no regard or consideration for the other people that live around them. This is very similar to people who blast shitty audio from their phones, walk on the left, take up the entirety of the sidewalk, don’t yield for pedestrians, don’t respect lines, etc. Assholes do, in fact, exist in many contexts.

      • I agree that zoning, while necessary, has been used improperly in some cases. Obviously, you don’t want a waste site near homes, hospitals, etc. On the other hand, there’s no reason you can’t have some kind of restaurant, grocery store, apartments, etc. in a neighborhood. In fact, that would be preferential, as it would reduce driving needs.