| 30 days ago | mod | Removed Comment Also, it seems a bit narcissistic to assume people should do all this. It is so complicated that I can't even comprehend what is going in here.
So when "apparatus" or "plurals" address me, I'll need to make up a giant manual about what pronouns and other language modifications I expect them to use so that they will not offend me. Although I guess it's more reasonable for a bot to do. by  ScoffingLizard ( ScoffingLizard@lemmy.dbzer0.com ) reason: Gatekeeping |
| 30 days ago | mod | Removed Comment To be frank, if you need to send someone a literal manual to understand your pronouns, you are not being a reasonable person. I'm sorry, but there's a point when you're just being rude to those around you. Figure out a reasonable and succinct way of representing your identity. Someone shouldn't insult you for having a gender so complex it requires a manual to understand it. But also, you can't place such an absurd burden on the people around you. Your right to waive your fist in the air stops where my right not to be hit in the face exists. I'm willing to respect people's pronouns, but in turn you need to respect other's time and have a realistic expectation of what people can manage. If you need to send someone a manual to understand your pronoun situation, you can't actually expect people to respect that. You're just making unreasonable and selfish demands of everyone around you.
Is this what you're complaining about, that people aren't willing to read a god-damn manual for your pronouns?
And no, this is nothing like asking cis people to respect the pronouns of trans people like he, she, they, etc. In these cases trans people are simply asking cis people to use a different pronoun than they otherwise would to describe a trans person. It's a case of, "hey, can you move me from this category of pronouns you use to this other category you use? I don't think this is unreasonable." What you're asking is, "hey, I need you to learn and master an entirely new and unique system of pronoun management. I think this is reasonable, and I also expect you to potentially do this for hundreds of other people you might meet. You'll need to learn hundreds of different pronoun systems and read hundreds of different pronoun manuals, otherwise you're a bigot."
For the love of all that is good and holy, this is ridiculous. Imagine trying to navigate pronouns rules this complex for hundreds of different people. Because that is effectively what you're asking. If you can have pronoun rules this complex, why not everyone else? Society cannot function this way.
If you want to have pronoun rules this complex that maybe you only expect your closest IRL friends and lovers to follow, fine. But this is not a reasonable request to ask of strangers on a message board. by isleepinahammock ( isleepinahammock@lemmy.blahaj.zone ) reason: Gatekeeping |
| 30 days ago | mod | Banned ruuster13 ( ruuster13@lemmy.zip ) from the community reason: Gatekeeping |
| 30 days ago | mod | Removed Comment Sounds like a bad faith attempt to claw your way into a real group (queer people) in order to delegitimize them. by ruuster13 ( ruuster13@lemmy.zip ) reason: Gatekeeping |
| 1 month ago | mod | Banned Tollana1234567 ( Tollana1234567@lemmy.today ) from the community reason: Bigot |
| 3 months ago | mod | Banned FuglyBunBun ( FuglyBunBun@futurology.today ) Banned from the community reason: Troll |
| 3 months ago | mod | Banned DragonTypeWyvern ( DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social ) from the community reason: Long history of bigotry |
| 3 months ago | mod | Banned Jerkface (any/all) ( jerkface@lemmy.ca ) from the community reason: Transphobe |
| 3 months ago | mod | Banned  mynameisbob ( mynameisbob@lemmy.ml ) from the community reason: Death threats |
| 7 months ago | mod | Banned threelonmusketeers ( threelonmusketeers@sh.itjust.works ) from the community reason: Moderates harry potter community that removes content critical of JKR |
| 8 months ago | mod | Banned  Cowbee [he/they] ( Cowbee@lemmy.ml ) from the community reason: Genocide denial |
| 8 months ago | mod | Banned humanspiral ( humanspiral@lemmy.ca ) Banned from the community reason: Misogyny |
| 8 months ago | mod | Banned [deleted] ( snooggums@piefed.world ) from the community reason: Transphobia |
| 8 months ago | mod | Unbanned Deacon ( deacon@lemmy.world ) from the community reason: Deleted comment and apologised via DM |
| 8 months ago | mod | Banned Deacon ( deacon@lemmy.world ) from the community |
| 9 months ago | mod | Banned dabluvr420 ( dabluvr420@lemmy.zip ) from the community reason: Troll |
| 10 months ago | mod | Banned whoever loves Digit 🇵🇸🇺🇸🏴☠️ ( iloveDigit@piefed.social ) Banned from the community reason: MAGA / ableism |
| 11 months ago | mod | Appointed  Jorunn (she/her) ( will_steal_your_username@lemmy.blahaj.zone ) as a mod to the community |
| 11 months ago | mod | Appointed  Jorunn (she/her) ( WillStealYourUsername@piefed.blahaj.zone ) as a mod to the community |
| 1 year ago | mod | Banned nesc ( nesc@lemmy.cafe ) from the community reason: Bigot/troll |
| 1 year ago | mod | Banned HubertManne ( HubertManne@piefed.social ) from the community reason: Used a transphobic slur |
| 1 year ago | mod | Locked Post After 2-year ban, trans Kansans will get to change gender on driver’s licenses |
| 1 year ago | mod | Removed Post DONT YOU EVER PUT ME IN A POSITION WHERE IM IN A SITUATION reason: Please keep this community to meta discussions of blahaj lemmy |
| 1 year ago | mod | Banned  Toes♀ ( Toes@ani.social ) from the community reason: Loli |
| 1 year ago | mod | Banned  NastyNative ( NastyNative@mander.xyz ) from the community reason: Racism |
| 1 year ago | mod | Banned DoucheBagMcSwag ( DoucheBagMcSwag@lemmy.dbzer0.com ) from the community reason: Racism/Bigotry |
| 1 year ago | mod | Banned endeavor ( endeavor@sopuli.xyz ) deleted by creator from the community reason: Ableism and mile long mod log |
| 1 year ago | mod | Appointed  Ada ( ada@piefed.blahaj.zone ) as a mod to the community |
| 2 years ago | mod | Removed Comment You can block it, but defederating doesn’t seems like a good idea for me.
I'm very aligned with lgbtq ideas (even if i would like better that the notion of gender itself stopped existing, so that people would stop discriminating themselves for dumb reason and be more diverse, but that’s another subject)
But i think defederating from instances you don’t like (except the *Very Bad* instances) would just make the fediverse more and more torn apart.
One of the coolest things of the fediverse is that you can navigate across instances, ideologies, without the need of using multiple accounts, it’s fe-diverse! If it is to stop that, then lets just go back to forums, it would be easier.
Plus instance wars have always been a dumb thing. (personal opinion and instance which will get me roasted lol) by  𒉀TheGuyTM3𒉁 ( TheGuyTM3@lemmy.ml ) reason: Gender diverse people aren't "discriminating themselves for dumb reasons" |
| 2 years ago | mod | Removed Comment If someone says they support me, I will assume they are genuine until proven otherwise. Not the other way around. I'm not going to demand proof that they have done something physical or monetarily to support queer folk, because even just voicing that they support us is support. by  🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 ( Kolanaki@pawb.social ) reason: You don't get to argue with trans folk about what trans allyship looks like |
| 2 years ago | mod | Removed Comment I was banned for not agreeing that allyship needs to be earned, and considering I am a queer person myself I have every fucking right to make that argument. by 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 ( Kolanaki@pawb.social ) reason: You don't get to argue with trans folk about what trans allyship looks like |
| 2 years ago | mod | Removed Comment Blowjob is also a porn term; is "blowjob" a slur?
The genre of porn describes hermaphroditic characters; characters that have both sets of sexual organs. It, as a genre of porn, also originated in Japan. It's not a slur in the use of the porn genre, and unless you've seriously run into transphobes calling transgender people "futas" in a disparaging manner, the argument that it's a slur is just more stupid gatekeeping based on a stupidly hot take. by 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 ( Kolanaki@pawb.social ) reason: Don't argue with trans folk that objectifying sexualised terms are actually ok |
| 2 years ago | mod | Removed Comment I'd like to actually see what they said, because this community has a habit of flying off the handle taking things that weren't offensive at all as highly offensive.
See: This post wanting to ban a word that is otherwise not used in the way the OP describes. by 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 ( Kolanaki@pawb.social ) reason: Don't argue with trans folk that objectifying sexualised terms are actually ok |
| 2 years ago | mod | Removed Comment Futanari is literally just the Japanese word for "hermaphrodite" (or for a straight translation "dual form") and used broadly to describe androgyny. by 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 ( Kolanaki@pawb.social ) reason: Don't argue with trans folk that objectifying sexualised terms are actually ok |
| 2 years ago | mod | Removed Comment >You should not be using the term "hermaphrodite" to describe any trans person, in that context it is demeaning and invalidating.
I agree with that. But have you seen anyone doing that? Or were they literally talking about hermaphrodites?
>Also you should never describe intersex people as "hermaphrodites" we are by in large not hermaphrodites and using this term against us is hurtful and invalidating
Intersex and hermaphrodite are two different categories of the same thing, and both exist. All hermaphrodites are intersex; but not all intersex people are hermaphrodites. Again, have you actually seen someone using the term disparagingly against someone, or were they just talking about a genre of porn that features characters that clearly have both male and female genitalia? by 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 ( Kolanaki@pawb.social ) reason: Don't argue with trans folk that objectifying sexualised terms are actually ok |
| 2 years ago | mod | Removed Comment My issue is with consent. It has nothing to do with being trans. This individuals "pronoun" is in reference to their kink of "dragonfucking," it has nothing to do with gender identity. I do not consent to participate in this voyeur's sexual arousal, and attempting to force others to do so makes the individual a sex pest. Protecting this behavior is protecting a predator. by Letstakealook ( Letstakealook@lemm.ee ) reason: Gatekeeping |
| 2 years ago | mod | Removed Post should we consider defederating? (.org) reason: "kys" is not acceptable |
| 2 years ago | mod | Removed Comment *Permanently Deleted* by Mr_Blott ( Mr_Blott@feddit.uk ) Banneddeleted by creator reason: Ironic flamebait |
| 2 years ago | mod | Removed Comment Hexbear.Net[,](https://sassacheck.org) originally Chapo.Chat, has sparked controversy due to rude behavior and controversial views from its users, leading to complaints on Blahaj.Zone and other Lemmy instances... Tensions grew, resulting in a defederation discussion that quickly became flooded with Hexbear users defending their actions.[.](https://medcertify.com.au/). by ejaz11 ( ejaz11@kbin.melroy.org ) reason: Spam |
| 2 years ago | mod | Removed Comment Good logical stance.
I think a lot of friction is coming from the person this post is about’s neopronouns being very clearly kink-related.
But many pronouns can be varying intensities of sexual or kinky. He/she implies a set of well-ingrained social stigmas and a general sexuality.
I see people refusing to want to be forced, via the social contract of self-validation, to engage with said clear kink.
But people who identify with pronouns of “he” or “she” are invalidated by bigots who view the person using one of the three basic singular pronouns in English as pushing their “kink” on them via that same social contract to validate a person’s self.
So clearly there cannot be a “line” where a pronoun becomes too kink-related, because the statement “ensuring someone does not engage with a kink without their consent via socially-forced pronouns is more important than validating that person’s sense of self” can be traced back all the way to the three basic singular pronouns in English and be used to invalidate someone’s use of them. A limit will invalidate people on the other side and can be walked back until everyone is invalidated.
So blocking if you do not want to engage with a certain intensity of pronoun-kink is the only logical way to deal with that kink-intensity issue people are having with pronouns/neopronouns.
We’re messy, world is messy, there is no line to be drawn. And you do not have to engage with neopronouns anyway, you can just avoid person-specific pronouns if those pronouns are too kink-ified or clumsy or difficult to remember. by  glizzyguzzler ( glizzyguzzler@lemmy.blahaj.zone ) reason: "kink related" |
| 2 years ago | mod | Removed Comment *Permanently Deleted* by  Cyv_ ( Cyv_@lemmy.blahaj.zone ) reason: Gatekeeping |
| 2 years ago | mod | Removed Comment It's interesting from an outside ally pov to watch this community bend itself into a pretzel and practice some of the most inane mental gymnastics I've ever seen to accommodate individuals who demand unreasonable accomodations.
This is like listening to Christians explain how they know that they know that they know that they know, that their God is real and has dominion over all.
For myself I choose not to interact with those individuals as I find them utterly exhausting to interact with.
Neopronouns may indeed have their place, but so far I have found every single individual claiming one to be someone that I am thankful to never have any interaction with. by Scary_le_Poo ( Scary_le_Poo@beehaw.org ) deleted by creator reason: Gatekeeping |
| 2 years ago | mod | Removed Comment best I can do is they or it. by  JoYo ( JoYo@lemmy.ml ) reason: Gatekeeping |
| 2 years ago | mod | Removed Comment Thankfully I am not from this neck of the woods so when the mod deletes my comment and bans me without a single word, it won't be a big deal.
These people talking in 3rd person are absolutely and undeniably trolling and they're doing it to mock these communities. If they're generally civil, I guess who cares, they're just making fun of you, but a lot of them are just trolls who want to create division and upset people. by JokeDeity ( JokeDeity@lemm.ee ) reason: Transphobia |
| 2 years ago | mod | Removed Comment Hey buddy thanks for the name calling. So these "brainworms" you're talking about, is that some kind of liberal slang for being neurodivergent?
Anyway you're more than welcome to post on !nonvoters@lemmy.blahaj.zone as much as you like. Please share all your opinions about how abstaining from the election is leftist praxis and trying to prevent fascism is liberal. by MindTraveller ( MindTraveller@lemmy.ca ) reason: Troll |
| 2 years ago | mod | Removed Comment Participation trophies for everyone by  Aussiemandeus ( Aussiemandeus@aussie.zone ) reason: Noted |
| 2 years ago | mod | Removed Post Leaving blahaj.zone and trans internet spaces in general. reason: Personal attacks on another user |
| 2 years ago | mod | Restored Post Leaving blahaj.zone and trans internet spaces in general. |
| 2 years ago | mod | Removed Post Leaving blahaj.zone and trans internet spaces in general. |
| 2 years ago | mod | Removed Post *Permanently Deleted* |
| 3 years ago | mod | Removed Post eurovision semifinal 2 notes reason: Offtopic for this sub |
| 3 years ago | mod | Removed Post eurovision halffinal notes reason: Wrong community for this |
| 3 years ago | mod | Removed Post You can be banned from Blahaj for calling out transphobia |
| 3 years ago | mod | Removed Post UPDATE: The transphobe Ada has been defending says they misgender all trans women/NBs on Blahaj who are strangers |
| 3 years ago | mod | Removed Post Boquet by gecisbugyi |
| 3 years ago | mod | Removed Post Twitter Outage |
| 3 years ago | mod | Unfeatured Post In approximately an hour Blåhaj Lemmy will be down for up to an hour to for premptive upgrades (Completed) in community |
| 3 years ago | mod | Unfeatured Post The next few days are going to be wild. Brace yourselves in community |
| 3 years ago | mod | Unfeatured Post Blåhaj Lemmy upgraded and migrated in community |
| 3 years ago | mod | Featured Post Blåhaj Lemmy upgraded and migrated in community |
| 3 years ago | mod | Removed Post Average Blahaj Lemmy User reason: Spam |
| 3 years ago | mod | Featured Post Blahaj Lemmy Users - Downvote question in community |
| 3 years ago | mod | Unfeatured Post Lemmy software updated in community |
