Online dating is so shit for the majority of hetero dudes. You’re lucky if you match with somebody, luckier if you get to have some kind of discussion that doesn’t end after a few messages, even luckier if it ends in a date, amazingly lucky if anything physical happens, and incredibly lucky if it turns into a relationship.
Men are expected to initiate, keep the discussion alive, ask out, keep the woman entertained, and be grateful they were chosen. It only gets worse online.
Online dating is shit for everyone
-a trans lesbian
this power imbalance is bad for everyone as well, if you meet up with someone via these (if are not male presenting), there is a concerningly high chance that you get sexually assaulted, I am terrified how common this seems to be among the women I’ve talked to
Male presenting? What does that mean?
I think they mean if you’re a woman (trans or cis), it can be terrifying to meet with people. At least that’s how I interpreted it.
Edit: Perhaps they are also talking about non-binary people, which is why they chose the words “not male presenting”.
People think they are male when they see them.
In addition to what the other posters said, even merely being a skinny twink (insufficiently male-presenting) is dangerous in some places
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Thanks to Tinder I had the best and the worst first dates in my life.
But both long term girlfriends and soon-to-be-my-wife I met through friends
This is partly because the apps suck (because of capitalism/profit motive) and partly because we all suck.
Many people of all genders won’t do better than “hey”. And then complain that they’re not having good experiences. Sometimes it’s garbage in, garbage out, my dudes.
I also get a lot of weird dead ends. Their profile will be like “I love elden ring”. You’ll be like “elden ring is a masterpiece! Did you play the new expansion yet?” They’ll be like “no”. End of messages. My dude. That’s not how this works. In real life, fine, maybe you can give a short answer and see what they do, read some body language. But in an asynchronous text only communication? That’s not pulling your weight. And if you’re not actually interested, just unmatch. If you don’t have time , don’t reply at all. It’s async. Come back later.
Maybe some of these people match with each other and are very happy with “what’s up?” “nm u?” “Im good” forever.
To be fair, real-life dating is also shit.
What is the definition of “online” for this chart? The first website wasn’t even up until 1991, so how can the line start at 1980?
Grandpa was trolling DARPAnet for skanks.
Soon to be a custard fist comic
Hmmm…. 🤔
BBS’es and Fidonet through modem were there before the web.
Don’t think many found each other on BBS’s but at least they could download low res porn.
In the early 1980s, ASCII porn :) NSFW: GIRL82.TXT, ripped by Usagi Electric
It’s a survey, so it relies on the surveyed to tell accurately the date they meet and how, so I won’t be surprised that the line here is incorrect.
Or maybe they refer to using classified ads in the newspaper or over of those “romantic meeting agency” (I don’t know the name in English, in French it is agence de rencontre) that existed back in the day
University hosted BBS in 1989 here.
This belongs in boringdystopia.
Looks like a bisected whale!
That’s interesting. I wonder whether those 6519 surveyed are representative of whole population, or of people who anyway online a lot. It’s seems there was an inflection around 2012 - what happened then ? The curve ends during covid lockdowns, wonder whether deflected since ?
Tinder launched in 2012. eHarmony and Match.com were pretty fringe sites but Tinder commodified and gamified the mechanics. That made online dating “fun”. Also we saw a huge growth in smart phones in 2010 to 2012
Reopen The Fuckhouses Goddamnit
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Trough family 👀
I don’t see hetero in the graph
Source?
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What about at the dog park?
when does attraction start? it feels weird that couples would exist in grade school (sorry if this is a dumb question, I am aromantic)
I believe this means how they met in general, not when they started dating.
Based on the only “next” school category being college, I’d assume that “grade school” includes high school, even if that is not a common usage
Is there a non-catbox link? It never loads for me and I can’t read the captions in the thumbnail image.
