To be fair: 95% of people saying ‘I get it’ definetly didn’t got it.
Sauce: Ask anyone working in IT support
I am impatient with long descriptions, but I do find that in a minority of cases, the description does lead in to a distinction that I would not have intuited.
I try to reflect on that during long descriptions, particularly ones that are highly redundant with something I remember.
Does anyone know people who tell you the same stories every other week and you already know it word by word? Do you say something or just wait awkwardly?
I have ADHD, I work in tech.
I’m pretty sure I’ve of my more troublesome clients is both extremely rude and also needs Ritalin.
Every time I say anything, they interrupt me with a reply, except, 90% of the time, they’ve didn’t actually understand what I was trying to say. The assumption they make about what I am saying is very consistently incorrect.
It’s really quite aggravating.
I only have this problem with my sister who will spend 30 minutes just to get to the point after grabbing my attention with 1 foot out the door as I am trying to leave.
Also annoying though are people who think they “get it”, stop listening and be interruptive after a few words, and totally miss the crucial part that comes later.
Other neurodivergent people are hard to hang out with, except for sharing our grievances in memes :-)
I find that ND peeps are much easier to get along with.
My therapist helped this by saying that there are no points. forgetting what you are saying in order to let others in is part of the deal.
it happens literally multiple billions a times a day. be part of team “it is ok not to make my point”.
it is a fun team to join.
Is that an ADHD thing?
It’s the impulse control and anxiety & frustration that builds from not giving in to the impulse that’s the challenge. That’s if you’re aware of the issue that if you do give in to the impulse you will likely come off as a dismissive asshole, and probabaly even condescending.
I have inattentive ADHD, so for me it’s not an impulse thing, it’s the fact that I’ll forget what I was going to say by the time someone has finished. So either I interrupt or we sit awkwardly while I try and remember what I was going to say and it sucks.
I have mixed. The impulse control sucks as well as forgetting comments. I’ve come up with some mechanisms to help me remeber from notes, making a fist and holding up a finger for each thing I want to say, etc. Sometimes my comments/questions are answered if I wait too. I sometimes still forget. However, the urge to grip my hands together and claw at the skin on my hands is very real if I resist the impulse to jump in or rush the person to their point.
Neurotypical people don’t grasp what the other wants to say after the first few sentences?
I miss Bob
This also happens to me in reverse. I get half a sentence out, the other person nods and says “yup” or “K”, and then i say “yeah k so then anyway” and on to the next point
Then you finally give up and zone out for a bit.
Until you realize they just asked you a question.my nd friend group has a protocol for this! if you think you already understand what the other person is saying, you just say “avocado”. then they either ask some questions to confirm or just say “ok but i wanna info dump anyways” and then it’s COLLABORATIVE info dumping!
That’s pretty cool but requires a tight group of cognizant NDs.
i gotta lotta unconditional love for my homies lol
People use so much fluff and crap filler talk…even emails I get, cherry pick information all over, cut the garbage out and a 4 paragraph email is 2 sentences.
Give information and facts and leave your stories and deep thought explanations out of it. It’s useless and horribly inefficient
It’s funny you say that. I’m actively working to add intro sentences to more of my emails to add “fluff”. Asking how their weekend was, commenting about the weather, sharing a one-sentence story about an experience I’ve had, etc.
I’m trying to build connection with people and not come off as terse/abrupt. My wife calls me out for it all the time.