We’ve all got one: Jar Jar, Star Trek V, Armageddon, the 1998 godzilla, Mac and Me, Amanda Heard in Aquaman.

There is no judgment here. Confess, receive absolution, find a friend who’s into the same weird, shameful stuff you are.

  • Fortress (1992). Christopher Lambert, Loryn Locklin and Kurtwood Smith star in this dystopian film about a couple who are sentenced to an inhumane, computer run, escape proof prison. The entertaining supporting cast includes Jeffrey Combs, of Reanimator fame and Clifton Collins who played Lawrence on WestWorld.

    It’s a cheesy, low rent sci-fi film that is bad in all the right ways.

    • I think I remember watching that one in the theater. We were kinda jazzed for it because of Lambert and Highlander fame (it wasn’t that long ago in 1992). I also mainly remember the exploding coller things. Not a single plot point though.

    • Wow - Loryn Locklin was in another of my guilty pleasures - Catch Me If You Can (not the DiCaprio one - this one’s a teen/racing flick starring Matt Lattanzi). And I’ve never been disappointed by either Christopher Lambert or Kurtwood Smith.

      I’m going to have to track this one down.

  • Jupiter Ascending, but more in the sense of “that wasn’t so bad, kinda campy fun,” than it becoming a personal favorite. At least Mila Kunis and Channing Tatum didn’t have literal negative chemistry, like Cara Delevingne and Dane DeHaan from Valerian.

  • Demolition Man. My dad has a hunting property in the middle of nowhere, Missouri. My brother and I would get dragged along as kids, but we typically stayed in the house. There was a VHS player and a TV there, and only 3 VHS tapes: Demolition Man, Falling Down, and some shitty porno my uncle didn’t hide very well. I’ve probably seen Demolition Man 20+ times in my life. I was at a bar in St. Louis, where I live, last week, (Playtpus is the bar, their head bartender was on Drink Masters!) and they had Demolition Man on TV. To my wife’s great annoyance, I insisted we stay a bit longer than we would have because I wanted to watch parts of it.

    • I loved that one too. That one was generally well reviewed and liked by critics and the general public. The crazy hate it got was from a very particular and loud group of people and was mostly based in misogyny.

  • She (1984) - It’s from the mid-80s and stars Sandahl Bergman - that pretty much says it all right there. But it’s so over-the-top cheesy and all delivered so earnestly that it works as a spoof.

    The Blood of Heroes (1989) - I don’t even feel particularly guilty about this one - Joan Chen, Rutger Hauer and Vincent D’Onofrio in a sort of cross between The Road Warrior and Rollerball, as players of a terribly brutal sport in a post-apocalyptic crapsack world. And with a great supporting bit by Hugh Keays-Byrne.

    Titan A.E. (2000) - I’m not sure at this point if I’m supposed to be ashamed of this one or not. I liked it all along, then somewhere along the way, I discovered that much of the internet apparently hated it. But it seems that in recent years, it’s started to gain some favor. Anyway, I like it.

    Jupiter Ascending (2015) - yes, it’s cheesy and forced and the villains are cartoonishly one-dimensional, but it’s stylish and fun and Mila Kunis and Channing Tatum are both enjoyable.

  • Conan the Barbarian is something I’ll watch whenever I run across it. Same with the original Dune. It’s a travesty compared to the books but I’m still grabbing popcorn and tucking in.

    Now, let’s talk about the use of the word “go” as a call to action. I hate it so much. You didn’t include the obligatory !.

    Fav sci-fi book to movie adaptation…. and go!!!

    Edit: I just remembered my all-time guilty pleasure in this genre(s). It’s The 13th Warrior. I love that silly movie with my whole heart.

  • Big Trouble in Little China. It’s more urban fantasy I suppose than scifi, but it’s my ultimate feel-good movie.
    Space Hunter and Adventures in the Forbidden Zone (1983) is high on my list too. Parts of it are SO bad, but the effects and set design (all practical fx) are really good. It’s just fun.