When I first read this article a few years ago I had very similar feelings to what I do today after a reread. Reflecting upon the content of the article and how the last few years have been for many, I don’t think a whole lot has changed yet. Then again, I don’t really participate in regular society anymore. I almost exclusively surround myself with unconventional people - queers, weirdos, artists, etc. and speaking about emotions is commonplace in these circles.
While I believe there is appropriate emphasis on deconstructing toxic masculinity and on creating safe spaces for men to share in and learn emotional intelligence through emotional communication, I think the fact that they need to be safe spaces rather than just a normal part of male society is precisely the problem. I suppose the safe spaces need to exist first, before society can push for this to be a normal part of male socialization. I also think that artist commentary is doing a great job of helping to deconstruct this, with popular programs showing this kind of behavior more often - men being emotionally vulnerable and having conversations about emotions. But that also might be a reflection of the kind of media I’m increasingly drawn towards, and not reflective of what hits the typical public eye.
My wife and I are so grateful that we learned a lot about emotional intelligence before we had our two boys. We are raising them to practice emotional intelligence with no shame. I was very fortunate to have a mother that talked to me about anything (thoughts, feelings, etc.).
When I first read this article a few years ago I had very similar feelings to what I do today after a reread. Reflecting upon the content of the article and how the last few years have been for many, I don’t think a whole lot has changed yet. Then again, I don’t really participate in regular society anymore. I almost exclusively surround myself with unconventional people - queers, weirdos, artists, etc. and speaking about emotions is commonplace in these circles.
While I believe there is appropriate emphasis on deconstructing toxic masculinity and on creating safe spaces for men to share in and learn emotional intelligence through emotional communication, I think the fact that they need to be safe spaces rather than just a normal part of male society is precisely the problem. I suppose the safe spaces need to exist first, before society can push for this to be a normal part of male socialization. I also think that artist commentary is doing a great job of helping to deconstruct this, with popular programs showing this kind of behavior more often - men being emotionally vulnerable and having conversations about emotions. But that also might be a reflection of the kind of media I’m increasingly drawn towards, and not reflective of what hits the typical public eye.
My wife and I are so grateful that we learned a lot about emotional intelligence before we had our two boys. We are raising them to practice emotional intelligence with no shame. I was very fortunate to have a mother that talked to me about anything (thoughts, feelings, etc.).