Getting hit with a lot of emotions. Some scary and some exciting.

My wife is being really supportive and we’ve been talking through all of this the past couple days nonstop.

Part of me is ready to shave everything and start HRT and feel pretty, but I’m also fucking terrified about how my world will react. It’s also only been a few days but I feel like a whole new world has been opened up to me?

I don’t know. I want to everyone and nobody so I thought I’d scream into the void here. Hope that is ok.

I’m so fucking empowered by all of you

  •  Vlaxtocia [she/her]   ( @Vlaxtocia@lemmy.blahaj.zone ) 
    1•9 months ago

    I semi-recently cracked too, I’d definitely recommend going for the full shave, it was super weird at first but then I loved it. Decided to let it all grow back so I could objectively compare and I’m 100% going to get rid of it again.

    Another note, if you can I’d definitely recommend speaking to a specialist, I had a lot of trouble coming to terms and accepting such a big change and speaking to a therapist super helped me accept it.

    •  oNevia   ( @oNevion@lemm.ee ) OP
      2•9 months ago

      Update on shaving, I finally did it and kinda went all the way. Shaved the usual bits but also my hands, feet, back and butt, lol. I feel so lovely ❤️

      I’ve actually been in therapy for a couple years and plan on telling my therapist tomorrow during our session :)

      Glad to hear therapy helped so much! I hope it will also help me come to terms with all the change because it really feels like a lot.

      •  Vlaxtocia [she/her]   ( @Vlaxtocia@lemmy.blahaj.zone ) 
        3•9 months ago

        Oh boy it does, I kind of cracked last year, but it was too scary so I repressed it and told myself I was NB instead. I want to shave my butt but my skin is sensitive and doesn’t like razor shaving, and anything less than smoothness down there is extremely itchy. It’s scary, but also exciting, because I don’t know what kind of woman I’ll be… Mostly scary now that I think about it, I’ve got an appointment next month with a makeover artist who specialises in MTF transformations, in hoping seeing myself like that will give me the burst of euphoria I need to see this through.

        •  oNevia   ( @oNevion@lemm.ee ) OP
          3•9 months ago

          Oh honey, I’m right there with you with the sensitive skin. I have so much razor burn everywhere. I definitely didn’t do it right. Gonna try nair next time as I’ve had good results in the past. Well mostly.

          One time I did my bikini area. And I mean everything and when it was time to take it off, I realized I missed a few spots so I felt the sensible thing was to just go ahead and put it on again right after… Oh my god the pain was intense on my most sensitive areas. Then had another bright idea to quickly wipe it off and add aloe vera gel to help with the burning sensation. Fell to the ground grasping my bits because it was so terribly painful. 😂 so don’t make that mistake.

          There’s a saying about beauty being painful right? Well. I definitely have the pain part down 😂

          I had no idea that there were make up artists like that! I live in rural Indiana (yikes) so not much in the way of gender affirming services around me but I really hope that goes well for you!

          If you’d like to talk to a new gal like me about some of these new feelings, I’m here ❤️ just try and focus on small changes that make you happy. Listen to that beautiful woman inside of you and you’ll find happiness :)