Welcome to the first (unofficial) Bad Writing Prompt day of the Beehaw Writing instance!

I’ve been reading a bit on the instance, and I agree with the consensus that we’re going to need something weekly to bring and keep a community together. So I’m doing my part!

Wait, what do you mean by bad writing prompts? Partially inspired by this post here.

“Don’t try to prove you’re a good writer, you’ll never write anything. Try to prove you’re a bad writer and you’ll write everything.”

So, here’s my general idea. For now, I’ll be posting 3 different things.

  • Bad Character Ideas
  • Bad Setting Ideas
  • Bad Plot Ideas

For you to mix, match and use as you please! Again, I’m writing this off the cuff and with 20 minutes before work, so apologies for the short post, but without any more delay, here’s what I got for you all!

Bad Character Ideas

  • The disgruntled younger sibling of the “Chosen One”

  • A food critic who actually suffers from no sense of taste, getting by on charisma and faking it alone

  • A magical anime girl who has a strange hobby and obsession with taxidermy (Thanks to my coworker for giving me this one haha)

Bad Setting Ideas

  • Cowboys and digimon. How that works I have no clue. Just. Cowboys and digimon combined. If you do this you have my eternal gratitude.

  • Told entirely through the lens of the endless blurb you skip before a recipe.

  • An office building set within purgatory itself.

Bad Plot Ideas

  • The main character has traveled back in time to kill Hitler. Little do they know is Hitler is now a skilled killer of time travelers.

  • A love story where two people are fated to be with one other, lest the world end. They hate each other.

  • A heist on the Vatican vault.

Alright, I’m running out of time, and need to skip off to work. Hope to see some posts, and remember to make it awful. I want some real schlock and cringe. Feel free to use all of the prompts, or none of them! Your reward will be nothing. Ciao ciao!

  • “It is the time!” Spoke Bob.

    “Indeed.” Answered Alice.

    “I must admit,” admitted Bob, “That I’d never thought it would come to this.”

    “I didn’t think it would come to this either.” Alice repeated.

    “I have something to confess”. Confessed Bob.

    “Oh! Why, in fact I wanted to confess something too!” Responded Alice.

    “Well out with it.” Spat Bob, “I’m not waiting for the figurative and/or literal end-of-the-world-as-we-know-it to end before you say it.”

    Alice made a face. Bob had seen faces before. He had seen Alice’s face before. But not this face. This face was one he had not seen before.

    “I refuse.” Shouted Alice angrily. She made another face that was different to the face she just made, that Bob also had not seen before. She was going to continue, but Bob interrupted her with a question that moved to the top of his thoughts.

    “Why?” Bob asked, as calmly as he could - which was very calm, going off what Dumbledore asked Harry Potter, in the movie, ‘Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire’. He though the book should have followed the source much more closely though.

    “Why?” Alice repeatedly repeated.

    Feelings were things women had. Alice was a woman. Therefore she had feelings. Her feelings told her to shout at Bob. She thought about it for an moment, and then shouted at Bob. Angrily. Very angrily. She said “Because my feelings are telling me to say this.”

    They made up, and the world-as-they-knew-it did not end, it continued.

    • Feelings were things women had. Alice was a woman. Therefore she had feelings. Her feelings told her to shout at Bob. She thought about it for an moment, and then shouted at Bob. Angrily. Very angrily. She said “Because my feelings are telling me to say this.”

      Incredible

      • Alice made a face. Bob had seen faces before. He had seen Alice’s face before. But not this face. This face was one he had not seen before.

        Love the repetition in this paragraph too, like bad poetry, and breaks the show, don’t tell rule so much that the shattered pieces become a thing of beauty.