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When Mats Steen died from a muscle-wasting disorder, his parents believed that his life had been a tragically lonely one — until hundreds of emails from strangers arrived. It turns out that he’d found friendship and even romance in a gaming community


Their son had lived by another name. To his family he had simply been Mats. But within World of Warcraft he had existed for years as a charismatic adventurer named “Ibelin”, a strapping swashbuckler with auburn hair tied back in a ponytail and a butch goatee beard. And it was as this digital alter ego that Mats had thrived in a way his family had never appreciated. They had misunderstood what World of Warcraft really was. It had seemed to them like a frenetic action game of monster-bashing and point-scoring. To Mats and the many people he played with – the people now emailing Robert and Trude – it was something far more profound: an immersive world built on social interactions, friendships and shared storytelling. Robert smiles. “This window started to open up to us that let us see he had another life besides his physical life. And that it had been so rich, so big and so full of contentment.”

  • I miss my online friends. They’re still around, it’s just hard to keep in contact in a way that works for us.

    One now has two young kids(!) And the others are all busy with jobs and stuff. Our schedules just don’t line up anymore(plus timezone issues! I’m online when they’re alseep)

    It felt like when we couldn’t game together anymore, everyone just kinda found it hard to keep in touch. I feel guilty about not trying to reach out more. But idk. It’s weird I guess

    • Me and some old guildies have kept in touch off and on over the years. Every once in a while I’d buy a wow expansion and do a couple of dungeons. We were really looking forward to making Diablo 4 our new hang out.

      We played like hell all through the beta. Then like twice in live. Then we all kinda decided it sucked. I think my good friend’s daughter is graduating soon. Or possibly already did. I can’t remember how much older than my own kids she was. I can remember when she was born.

      He’s still like a brother to me, but we’ve got fuck all in common any more and we can’t keep talking about glory days that were damn near 20 years ago.