What’s crackalacking! Yeah, I’m actually sticking to this, since it seems like a lot of people had a lot of fun with it last week, and I’m still having fun forcing my horrible ideas onto the unsuspecting populace of beehaw. And then you lot, entirely forgetting the point of all this take the bad ideas and actually make them entertaining! How could you?! I’ve actually become emotionally attached to Emo-Chan and her battle to defeat Hitler. Of the drama obsessed story teller food critic. Alice and her Woman Emotions. And, of course, the late entry of Timmy’s Taco Tuesday Torment. (How could you miss the alliteration you MONSTER)
Jokes aside, I’m going to do things a bit differently this time. I’ve always found the traditional reddit writing prompt to be a bit too limiting, so I’ll be trying to include some writing prompts that don’t really follow the formula of “here’s a story idea.” To a greater extreme. Also, feel free to post your own prompts in the comments, I’ll try to edit the post to include them, and if I find the time/energy to, I’ll write a few myself. No promises though, I’m a lazy bastard.
Adding onto that, I want to stress that the point of this activity is just to write. Not write a complete or even good story. Just to write. If you don’t like the prompts, ignore em, or make up your own, or write about how bad the prompts are. I don’t care just write!
Now, I’ll stop fudging around and give you the prompts of the week.
Bad Character Ideas
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Like, omigosh, did you see that Janet was going out with Hugnthlenbar? She totes just dumped Jason for him too! Ugh, what a, like, totes bitch, right?
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A young shonen protagonist, ready to take on the world with his best friend! The parasitic alien fungus that occupies the right side of his body. He is still relentlessly positive.
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Elves… As wise as they are old. And of course they all old, right? I mean, it’d be unthinkable for the wandering Elf spouting wisdom of the ancients for the low low price of $699.99 (plus gratuity) to not be old. R-Right?
Bad Setting Ideas
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In honour of facebook market place deciding that my one and only desire in this world is apparently milk kefir grains (no I don’t know what they’re used for either), the story is set and explained through horrible social media posts.
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Check it out! Fashion revolution, new styles and the hottest new designs to wear in the post apocalypse world!
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Everyone knows the get stuck in the videogame plot. And that’s already bad. But what if the videogame also just sucked? Glitchy, unfinished, and nearly entirely empty.
Bad Plot Ideas
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A deep intrigue story filled with deep plots where everyone has their own interests. It’s for a baking competition.
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Since I’m apparently on an anime roll here right now. The plot is that the cast is trying to kill God. God is just a chill dude though.
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An adventure story where the dohicky that everyone is after is lost media from a children’s TV show from the 70s. This is treated with a grand amount of severity.
Unique Idea!
- Hey, you know that piece of media that you love? The one close to your heart? Write a bias an unfair review of it where you rip it to shreds and call it shit.
Alright, once more I’m running out of time before work. Thanks for reading, and double thanks for posting! I’m off and out, see you all next week!
Elize Caram was humming softly as she was putting the finishing touches on her latest creation. Marie O’Bain observed her target carefully through her scope, hoping to catch her in the act of cheating, with regards to the rules and regulations governing this particular endeavor. Not as in the act of cheating between lovers or companions in an exclusive relationship, but the far more serious kind of cheating that goes on in televised baking competitions.
Marie trained her rifle on Elize, as she moved from counter to oven. Elize being the person moving that is, not Marie. It would be really weird if Marie would try to shoot Elize from a considerable distance while simultaneously decorating a cake. No Marie had been clever and had already baked her cake this afternoon. She was sure it was going to be a winner. She’d bribed one judge already, blackmailed another, and arranged for the sudden removal of another judge’s lower intestines.
Nothing nor nobody was going to stand between her and the ultimate prize. The only threat left was Elize, with her dimply freckled charm up the wazoo. Oh gosh I can’t believe you guys picked me, I’m positively gushing with undeserved glee, “blegh” Marie thought. Baking is no place for twee feelings, not an environment for the giddy or the soft-hearted. “Baking is hell,” Marie thought, pulled the trigger.
A shot rang out in the amphitheatre, destroying a beautiful Schwarzwalder kirsch torte and killing a surprised woman in the same moment. The stage was strewn with blood and brown cake. As Marie moved from her position in the skybox down to the floor, she smiled to herself. When she reached the corpse of her rival, she bent down and rifled through her pockets. Elize’s pockets, not her own, of course, she could be looking for something at that moment in her own pockets, but in this case, they were the pockets of the corpse below her. Also, she was not using her rifle to rifle through the pockets, which would be weird. She did have a second pocket rifle with her at the time, though mentioning this would be superfluous.
Due to not appearing the next day, Elize was disqualified, and Marie won the competition. The remaining judges praised her for her innovative use of meat in desserts, and her bold choice of flavor in the pink icing.