This question is a joke. Also, the mods should add a joke tag to allow dumb answers.

    • cerement ( cerement@slrpnk.net ) 
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      3 years ago

      heads up, there’s a reason I labeled them “stories” (certainly not something you can confirm through the church) – most of the stories come up as “secret knowledge” within the various esoteric/hermetic/gnostic sects and usually make reference to the Gospel of Mary Magdalene

      • possibilities include
        • most likely, Gospel of Mary, part of the Berlin Codex – somewhere between 100 and 150 CE maybe
        • less likely, Dialogue of the Saviour, part of the Nag Hammadi library – maybe 150 CE
      • two main councils for determining the New Testament (and remember they didn’t have carbon dating to determine authenticity)
      • we do know
        • the 12 disciples were sexist
        • Mary Magdalene was a single noble lady – a perfect target for misogynistic slander painting her as a prostitute
      • Wait, does your story include that the council found it preferable to say the Son of God, King of the Jews, legitimate heir of King David, hangs out with a prostitute than with a noble woman?

        • cerement ( cerement@slrpnk.net ) 
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          3 years ago

          more insipid than that – that he would rather spend time with her instead of his “best buds” was clearly not right, so she must’ve been cheating – and if she was a proper woman, she would’ve been married already, something must be wrong with her …