• I think we should normalize referring to people who are straight but haven’t explicitly told people they’re straight as not having “come out” as straight. It’s a heteronormative bias. If anything we actually don’t know if they’re straight. More importantly, I think it helps illustrate the bizarre nature of the “duty to come out” as you call it.

    •  apis   ( @apis@beehaw.org ) 
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      611 months ago

      Jfc this one drives me nuts.

      Number of times I’ve been party to conversations where the prevailing attitude was that because someone didn’t announce themselves as gay, then they couldn’t possibly be gay.

      “Were you talking about sexuality at any point?”

      “Had they been attracting the interest of the opposite sex, or same sex for that matter?”

      “Was there any conversation or non-verbal interaction where their sexuality might have been vaguely relevant?”

      “Did you declare your own sexuality to them?”

      “Yeah, but that’s different!”

      Fuckers never can explain what they think is different about it, funnily enough.

      See also: straight people getting in a lather because a gay person is flirting with someone of the opposite sex.