Not really an answer to the question, but does anyone else think that the phrases “take a shit” and “give a shit” seem swapped? You say you’re gonna take a shit when you are giving one to the toilet, and you say you don’t give a shit when you are unwilling to take shit.

Pooping station

I’ll be in my office downloading some files.

An old timey one I heard was ‘I need to see a man about a horse’ and one I’ve actually heard people use was ‘I need to drop the kids off at the pool.’

Drop the Browns off at the Super Bowl, drop a duece, “are you gonna take a [first name] and wipe your [last name]?”

Leave a deposit, drop the kids off at the pool.

Growing a tail.

Backing one out.

Laying some deep sea cable.

Taking an Edgar/Bradley/Travis (Britt/Pitt/Tritt)

Snapping one off.

Pinching off a loaf.

Giving birth to a project manager.

“delivery report”

“Practicing the tuba” is my go-to with peers, but if I need to be delicate I might say someone “had to step into another room for a minute”. To my family, I say “I’m going to sit down upstairs for a little while” and they know what I mean.

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The throne is a frequent one.

Also releasing torpedoes, and Talking to God