There is a house I walk by occasionally that I absolutely love. It’s old and run down but definitely art deco in a modest kind of way, with round balconies and a gold brick doorway. As a joke, I keep telling people this is my future house.
I say as a joke because I am a broke millennial. I have accepted my fate of never moving past paying rent for a place to live and spending the remainder of my minimalist income on avocado toast and oat milk lattes.
But recently, I saw a “For Sale” sign in front of the house and this is probably my only chance to ever see its art deco interior, if any is left, before it’s all turned into a modern and soulless place.
I have called the seller and I overheard its asking price when they referred to it as the “1.1 million euro house”. They asked twice if that was indeed the one I wanted to visit.
The visit date will be set next week.
Now, how do I sound like I’m the kind of person who doesn’t flinch at the idea of spending a million euros on a house? What questions do I ask? What might they ask me in return? What are things I shouldn’t say?
Some extra information:
- This is in Brussels, Belgium
- A permit was requested to split the house into 5 apartments (2 floors could be built above the existing 3)
- It was originally built as a single family home
Edit: this is the house
Just say you recently came into some inheritance and that you are looking into investment opportunities. Then they will expect you to be out of your element, so you won’t need to try to pretend you’re someone you’re not. If they ask about the inheritance, say your grandfather made a fortune selling lumber or something boring like that.
Okay, that’s really smart!
“Hi, I’m Vincent Adultman. Just in case you’re wondering, I’m definitely not 3 kids in a trenchcoat pretending to be an adult. Now let’s do a business.”
1.1M € for this ?!
Having bought 2 in my lifetime so far my approach has always been to say bugger all to the agent. I owe them nothing. If I have questions I ask, if they ask me questions I give them the most limited information possible, obviously being polite. I always kept my cards close to my chest until it was time to lift the auction paddle.
Say very little; it’s none of their business. Dress how you normally would.
You want to know rental prices for each unit. The last assessed tax rate. How the utilities are paid, ie, each unit has its own billing or if its all comon. What the building rates for utilities are that are not covered by the renters. Age of all building utility like water boiler / heat or anything like that and if they are on a maintenance contract. And as you walk around you are inspecting for what repairs need to be done. No need to look impressed by what you see, you are only looking to see if the property will be a cash generation machine or money pit.
Aka ack like a landlord
“What schools are nearby?”
“Is the walk in humidor full or partial?”
“Can the windows be taken out for moving in large furniture? I own Salvador Dali’s favorite piano.”
I’m assuming open houses aren’t a thing in Belgium? In the US, it’s no big deal to walk in to an open house and just tell the agent that you live in the neighborhood, like the house and have always wanted to see the inside. They’re usually pretty chill about that.
Seems like OP had to make a viewing appointment with the showing agent
Questions to ask if you feel like it:
How much does an average apartment go by in rent around this area? (This’ll create the assumption that you’ll buy it all and put all apartments to rent)
How’s the neighborhood? How noisy is it on a scale of 1-10?
Are there spaces to park multiple cars?
I thought this would be about being s whole lot more wealthy, so I had questions ready a colleague of mine overheard from a seven year old.
“What is your estate called?”
“How many barrels of land does your family own?”
When it comes to a million euro house, I don’t think you need to behave that differently from what’s your norm. People from every walk of life can come into that kind of money, be it from inheritance, a good job, lucky investment or help from parents. Just pretend it’s a house you can barely afford and ask questions as if you’re considering buying it. Point out flaws. Or don’t, you’re allowed to reserve judgement.
Yeah, this is the normal price of a house in many large cities. It’s a lot mind you, but an adult in a high paying field can get a mortgage that covers that.
You don’t need a million dollars to buy a million dollar house. You need to be able to make a million dollars and enough to live on in 30yrs, or whatever the length of the mortgage is. Someone in their 30s-40s can fit that bill, so just be yourself.
If they ask if you have financing, say yes. If they ask more questions, say you will be glad to discuss that after the tour. Afterwards, just politely say you’re not interested and leave.
Show up in a ripped shirt with a mustard stain on it looking dazed and slightly disinterested, like you already visited 4-5 houses that day.
Ask if there’s any history of water damage or flooding - it looks like the garage would let water flow down into it. There are visible cracks near the roof. Important things to know to protect your “investment”.
Also, please do follow up. I want to know how this goes.
I can’t help, but would love a update once you are done.
Bonus points if you wear a recording device or film some of it.
I’m not sure about questions to ask but you should definitely wear a monocle
Ooooh, there’s a short story you should check out, by Vonnegut- “Any reasonable offer”
Let’s get you into a beautiful house. Options:
As a student, overseas relative is helping you buy, has set the budget and you’re going around and looking at places to get a feel for what’s available in the price range
Or maybe you’ve just taken a new job position nearby and want to stay in the area and the exterior has the charm you’re after,and curious to see what you get inside for the price
Pull up a few other places being sold for same price range and note a couple of small things that one of them has, that this might not. Act like those are a bigish deal because “the one over in sint-gilles has xyz, and that was one of the things on my partner’s list of deal breakers”
Look wealthy, mention offhand that financing is handled by the trust, and the board is open to investing, and you just wanted to put eyes on the place before you advise them to commit,then ask a few questions about the neighborhood after dark, so they focus on convincing you without paying too much attention to the rest
They’ll likely poke a bit about your story, and wonder about your financing, but its also super normal for people to be at the end of a long day and focused on paying attention to remembering details of the house or taking pictures and not really bothering to talk, so deflect or ignore.
Check a few faucets, ask when the electricity was brought up to code, and ask if they’ve already gotten estimates for any repairs that would need to be made before you were to move in
Do report back!
I can’t really help you, but I do want to say: if you get in I want poctures, that house looks awesome.