This is literally my current relationship situation, and hey, I’m happy :3
We both look a bit different on the outside, but on the inside…this is us 🩷

Also I won’t ever stop wearing this really fucking stupid-looking hoodie. You literally can’t make me 😭

      • Bev's Dad ( BevsDad@lemmy.ca ) English
        16·
        1 day ago

        Can you blame us for liking you cuties?

        Gender fuckery of some sort has been a common theme with the people I’ve liked so I’m just glad it works for everyone involved!

      • birdwing ( birdwing@lemmy.blahaj.zone ) English
        10·
        1 day ago

        I feel it’s because (generally), they like both either way and so their loved one transitioning is like having both cakes and eat it too /lh

        Not in a chaser sense, but a genuine sense of “omg, amazing, i get to enjoy both sides from the same person?” and that for a trans person, being pre-transition, they can feel safer knowing chances are in their favour that the other will like them regardless.

        Like I’ve heard tales w/ cishet and trans relationships where it is more of a coinflip – sometimes they realise they do love them regardless, othertimes they realise, “sorry, i don’t swing that way”. And that is okay too, as long as it ends on good terms. That goes in general with most relationships and ties: whether they strand or not, having good terms is the big part.

        Sure, it can still be the case that it doesn’t work out eventually between bi and trans people in a relationship. But that’s less likely to be due to the transition itself, and that’s kind of relaxing in some way.

        (signed, someone who got adopted by a bi person before)

        • Miisha ♀️ ( Miisha@lemmy.blahaj.zone ) OPEnglish
          3·
          24 hours ago

          There you are! I was actually really starting to miss you, wondering if I had done something. No, reaching out didn’t occur to me 😭

          Forgive me for this…I somehow didn’t piece together you were bi. It’s good to know, tho! Keep being awesome 🩷

    • Maelvie ( Maelvie@lemmy.blahaj.zone ) English
      5·
      19 hours ago

      The simple explanation is that bi implies a binarity of gender (men/women) but pan applies to everybody regardless of their physical attributes (you’re attracted to a person, whatever physical form they may have)

      • Bev's Dad ( BevsDad@lemmy.ca ) English
        1·
        5 hours ago

        This is the correct definition for sure but in my experience soooo many functionally pan people label themselves as bi for one reason or another. Either because that’s the first queer label they’ve found for themselves, because it sounds cuter or because they’d rather not have to explain what pan means for the thousandth time.

      • tomenzgg ( tomenzgg@midwest.social ) English
        4·
        10 hours ago

        No; it doesn’t. We’ve been saying this since, at least, the 90s:

        Bisexuality is a whole, fluid identity. Do not assume that bisexuality is binary or duogamous in nature: that we have “two” sides or that we must be involved simultaneously with both genders to be fulfilled human beings. In fact, don’t assume that there are only two genders. Do not mistake our fluidity for confusion, irresponsibility, or an inability to commit. Do not equate promiscuity, infidelity, or unsafe sexual behavior with bisexuality. Those are human traits that cross all sexual orientations. Nothing should be assumed about anyone’s sexuality, including your own.

        —The Anything That Moves Manifesto, 1990

        Bisexuals are attracted to people who have the same gender as their own and those who have a gender different from their own; that’s the extent of the two.