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Philo ( Philo@lemm.ee )  to World News · 3 years ago

Italian man crushed to death by thousands of falling cheese wheels

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Italian man crushed to death by thousands of falling cheese wheels

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Philo ( Philo@lemm.ee )  to World News · 3 years ago
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An Italian man has been crushed to death under thousands of vast wheels of a parmesan-style hard cheese, which weigh about 40kg each, firefighters have said.
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  • blackluster117 ( blackluster117@possumpat.io ) 
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    3 years ago

    My condolences to his family, that must have been a horrifying experience and I’m sorry for their loss. Human moment out of the way, I almost thought this was an Onion article. That headline is hysterical.

    • 𝙚𝙧𝙧𝙚 ( erre@programming.dev ) 
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      3 years ago

      If we don’t truly die until we’re forgotten by the living, he’s gonna live a long time as the ancestor that passed away at the hands of cheese wheels.

      • LucyLastic ( LucyLastic@beehaw.org ) 
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        3 years ago

        That’s a very philosophically positive way of thinking about it!

      • teft ( teft@startrek.website ) 
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        3 years ago

        He’s going to haunt those hallowed cheese halls. Some one bust out the Luigi board.

        • blur457 ( blur457@lemmy.zip ) 
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          3 years ago

          Luigi board

          Is that the Italian version of a Ouija Board?

          • teft ( teft@startrek.website ) 
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            3 years ago

            ;)

      • WarmSoda ( WarmSoda@lemm.ee ) 
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        3 years ago

        He’ll be reposted for all of eternity

    • Chetzemoka ( Chetzemoka@kbin.social ) 
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      3 years ago

      Yeah, I sort of feel like something like this would be a horrifying death process followed by an afterlife of “yeah, ok, that was a pretty funny way to go out.”

      You can only hope that the end arrives quickly with something like this.

    • zaplachi ( zaplachi@lemmy.ca ) 
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      3 years ago

      Does anyone know if there is a nottheonion community on lemmy?

      • 15liam20 ( 15liam20@feddit.uk ) 
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        3 years ago

        https://lemmy.world/c/nottheonion

        I didn’t find a Not the Cheese and Onion community though

  • ivanafterall ( ivanafterall@kbin.social ) 
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    3 years ago

    “Parmesan, sir? Just say when…” -The Olive Garden Waiter

    Me:

  • sincle354 ( sincle354@beehaw.org ) 
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    3 years ago

    Best wishes to his family. At home, drawers and other furniture tragically crushes babies once every two weeks in the U.S. If you have small children, as part of your baby/childproofing, buy and use anti-tip or furniture straps to prevent this kind of thing happening.

    As for occupational hazards, this is a stark reminder of the risk behind storing large amounts of anything, including grain silo entrapment, flammable material storage, and even the Beirut explosion. I can legitimately say that manufacturing flour is perhaps the most dangerous food to produce at mass scale. As for weight, ss soon as over 100lbs/50kg goes over your head, make sure you have sufficient structural stability in your shelf.

  • Granite ( Granite@kbin.social ) 
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    3 years ago

    Not the Dragonborn…

    • morphballganon ( morphballganon@mtgzone.com ) 
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      3 years ago

      Let me guess. Someone stole your thousands of cheese wheels?

    • argv_minus_one ( argv_minus_one@beehaw.org ) Banned
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      3 years ago

      This incident has Sheogorath written all over it, though.

      • Granite ( Granite@kbin.social ) 
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        3 years ago

        And the CHEESE

  • Default_Defect ( Default_Defect@midwest.social ) 
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    3 years ago

    I imagine this is to Italians as dying gloriously in battle is for vikings. He went to the great kitchen in the sky.

    • jcarax ( jcarax@beehaw.org ) 
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      3 years ago

      Wisconsin stands in solidarity.

  • BurritoBooster ( BurritoBooster@feddit.de ) 
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    3 years ago

    Let the cheesy puns begin!

    • gac11 ( gac11@lemmy.ml ) 
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      3 years ago

      I was going to go with a simple, tasteful remark such as “Mamma Mia!”

    • Michael ( michael@lemmy.perthchat.org ) 
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      3 years ago

      Say cheese… and uhh… that’s all I got.

      • NotSpez ( NotSpez@lemm.ee ) 
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        3 years ago

        That was wheelie cheesy but someone had to do it!

    • itsgallus ( itsgallus@beehaw.org ) 
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      3 years ago

      Rest in… cheese

  • sh00g ( sh00g@kbin.social ) 
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    3 years ago

    This is how I want to go out. A burial fit for a king indeed.

  • Coskii ( Coskii@lemmy.blahaj.zone ) 
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    3 years ago

    Considering the size of those wheels, I feel like it’d only take two or three. They are massive and that is terrifying.

  • KrakBamKrak ( KrakBamKrak@lemm.ee ) 
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    3 years ago

    If it were American “cheese” he’d be preserved for a millenia!

  • bedrooms ( bedrooms@kbin.social ) 
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    3 years ago

    Italian equivalent of failed Russian window

    • vacuumflower ( vacuumflower@lemmy.sdf.org ) 
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      3 years ago

      ???

      Living in Russia, sincerely don’t get the joke.

      Asphyxiating because of the poisonous gasses from a pickled cabbage tank, or drowning in vodka, or something like that I can understand. But what’s with the windows?

      • Limeade ( Limeade@beehaw.org ) 
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        3 years ago

        Russia has a reputation for suspicious deaths by defenestration.

        Example: https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2022/12/russian-tycoon-pavel-antov-dies-putin-ukraine/672601/

        • vacuumflower ( vacuumflower@lemmy.sdf.org ) 
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          3 years ago

          Ah. No such meme inside Russia.

          I mean, there are from time to time suspicious deaths of such people, and the timing is sometimes interesting, but these are all kinds of deaths, - heart attacks, car crashes, aneurisms , whatever.

  • 🦊 OneRedFox 🦊 ( OneRedFox@beehaw.org ) 
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    3 years ago

    Think he’ll smell like pizza when they cremate him?

    • Damage ( Damage@slrpnk.net ) 
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      3 years ago

      So all cheeses are the same to you, huh? Racist.

      • 🦊 OneRedFox 🦊 ( OneRedFox@beehaw.org ) 
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        3 years ago

        It’s ok, some of my best friends are cheeses.

  • kemsat ( kemsat@lemmy.villa-straylight.social ) 
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    3 years ago

    Good night, sweet King.

  • MorrisonMotel6 ( MorrisonMotel6@lemm.ee ) 
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    3 years ago

    This how the cheese wants to broken

  • Froyn ( Froyn@kbin.social ) 
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    3 years ago

    That definitely ranks higher than being killed by 30,000 lbs of bananas. I wonder if we’ll get a song from this tragedy as well.

    • leopardpuncher ( renard_roux@beehaw.org ) 
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      3 years ago

      There’s a song about being crushed by bananas? 😳

      • Chetzemoka ( Chetzemoka@kbin.social ) 
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        3 years ago

        Enjoy: https://youtu.be/OGldNpngDws

        • leopardpuncher ( renard_roux@beehaw.org ) 
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          3 years ago

          Thank you! That was a new one for me 😅

      • Froyn ( Froyn@kbin.social ) 
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        There’s a true story behind the song:
        https://news.wgcu.org/2022-03-17/song-of-the-day-for-march-18-30-000-pounds-of-bananas-by-harry-chapin

        Then the song itself:
        Harry Chapin - Thirty Thousand Pounds of Bananas
        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OGldNpngDws

        • keeb420 ( keeb420@kbin.social ) 
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          3 years ago

          The tally man had a lot of bananas to tally that day.

          • leopardpuncher ( renard_roux@beehaw.org ) 
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            3 years ago

            The tallying of the banana tallyman takes quite the toll! He just wants to go home, really 🍌

        • ForestOrca ( ForestOrca@kbin.social ) 
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          3 years ago

          Fun Fact: You can drop that link above into the search bar on this (https://inv.citw.lgbt/feed/popular), or any INVIDIOUS instance, and get to hear that song without being tracked.

          Lyrics for the Literate

          "It was just after dark when the truck started down
          the hill that leads into Scranton Pennsylvania.
          Carrying thirty thousand pounds of bananas.
          Carrying thirty thousand pounds (hit it Big John) of bananas.

          He was a young driver,
          just out on his second job.
          And he was carrying the next day’s pasty fruits
          for everyone in that coal-scarred city
          where children play without despair
          in backyard slag-piles and folks manage to eat each day
          about thirty thousand pounds of bananas.
          Yes, just about thirty thousand pounds (scream it again, John) .

          He passed a sign that he should have seen,
          saying “shift to low gear, a fifty dollar fine my friend.”
          He was thinking perhaps about the warm-breathed woman
          who was waiting at the journey’s end.
          He started down the two mile drop,
          the curving road that wound from the top of the hill.
          He was pushing on through the shortening miles that ran down to the depot.
          Just a few more miles to go,
          then he’d go home and have her ease his long, cramped day away.
          and the smell of thirty thousand pounds of bananas.
          Yes the smell of thirty thousand pounds of bananas.

          He was picking speed as the city spread its twinkling lights below him.
          But he paid no heed as the shivering thoughts of the nights
          delights went through him.
          His foot nudged the brakes to slow him down.
          But the pedal floored easy without a sound.
          He said “Christ!”
          It was funny how he had named the only man who could save him now.
          He was trapped inside a dead-end hellslide,
          riding on his fear-hunched back
          was every one of those yellow green
          I’m telling you thirty thousand pounds of bananas.
          Yes, there were thirty thousand pounds of bananas.

          He barely made the sweeping curve that led into the steepest grade.
          And he missed the thankful passing bus at ninety miles an hour.
          And he said “God, make it a dream!”
          as he rode his last ride down.
          And he said “God, make it a dream!”
          as he rode his last ride down.
          And he sideswiped nineteen neat parked cars,
          clipped off thirteen telephone poles,
          hit two houses, bruised eight trees,
          and Blue-Crossed seven people.
          it was then he lost his head,
          not to mention an arm or two before he stopped.
          And he slid for four hundred yards
          along the hill that leads into Scranton, Pennsylvania.
          All those thirty thousand pounds of bananas.

          You know the man who told me about it on the bus,
          as it went up the hill out of Scranton, Pennsylvania,
          he shrugged his shoulders, he shook his head,
          and he said (and this is exactly what he said)
          “Boy that sure must’ve been something.
          Just imagine thirty thousand pounds of bananas.
          Yes, there were thirty thousand pounds of mashed bananas.
          Of bananas. Just bananas. Thirty thousand pounds.
          of Bananas. not no driver now. Just bananas!” "

          /Lyrics from The Harry Chapin Archive at Harrychapin.com\

        • leopardpuncher ( renard_roux@beehaw.org ) 
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          3 years ago

          Thank you for the context! 👍👍

  • shiveyarbles ( shiveyarbles@beehaw.org ) 
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    3 years ago

    Mayor McCheese, bring down that wall!

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