Three years ago my wife and I got three pet rats. A little over a year later, we added two more, and for a brief moment had a lovely little mischief of five happy boys.

Then we lost one of the new babies in a freak accident after he got injured during a scrap, then, a few months after that, the first of the original trio left us, and so on, and so on, until today, when the last of the new babies, who was now just over two, passed away.

And as much as I try to focus on the happy times, watching them boing about on the sofa, or stealing snacks from us, or just snuggling inside the hood of my jumper and falling asleep, it’s really hard to reconcile that with their short little lives.

We recently adopted a pair of 6yo cats, and while they could feasibly spend the next 10/15 years with us, there’s always that nagging doubt that they’ll suddenly develop an incurable illness, and we’ll lose them too soon.

But that’s all kinda worth it when they’re asleep on your lap, purring away. Or in the case of the ratties, boggling and bruxing.

Sorry if this is a bit maudlin; I’ve just buried Wilbur in the garden, and I miss my little toast-stealing friend.

Wilbur

  • I’m with you on the rats, no question.

    I had many, 10 total? Only having 2-3 at same time. We absolutely loved having them, tiny dog personalities. Even decent with kids. Just got sick of how often we lost one.

    Man they were amazing though.

    •  DJDarren   ( @DJDarren@beehaw.org ) OP
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      1 year ago

      Yeah, my reaction to losing them is a good chunk of why my wife suggested not getting any more. I don’t deal with it very well. I go to pieces, quite frankly. When I took Feegle for his last trip a few months ago, the vet’s receptionist asked if I wanted to wait in a quiet room, no doubt because my sniffling and dribbling was putting off the other customers.

      But Feegle was adorable.

    •  DJDarren   ( @DJDarren@beehaw.org ) OP
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      1 year ago

      Of the five we had, Wilbur was by far and away the pointiest of nose, and the most questionable of parentage, but I still loved him. He could yoink a Cheerio like nobody’s business.

      This was Nac, Mac, and Feegle, at about eight months old, I think.

      It was really hard to take good photos of them…

      • That photo is so adorable.
        We had 10 over the course of about 5 years, but yeah it got sad saying goodbye all the time. Rats are hugely underrated as housepets. They are super sociable, and smart. When I see snaps like yours I miss having them, but when I read posts like yours I remember why I don’t.

        It was a while ago now and I’m rubbish with photos anyway, so not sure I can pay the pet tax. If I find anything I’ll come back and edit.

  • I’m so sorry for your loss. I keep fish, especially Betta fish, and I reached a point where I realised I’d have to accept their short lives because they bring me such joy. So I’ll just pass on what one of my friends often says: “May their memory always be for a blessing.”

  •  criticon   ( @criticon@lemmy.ca ) 
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    121 year ago

    We lost our cat last week, he was supposed to be 2yo when we adopted him but after he got very sick the vet told us he was probably a senior cat. He was with us for 3 years (covid baby) and I miss him so much, it’s so hard to lose a pet, everyone I return home the house feels so empty. I’m sorry for your loss OP, I hope it gets better

  • We bought few chickens (hens) and if you want reliable source of eggs from them you have to replace them after 2 years.

    It will be sad dinner/lunch next year.

    But seriously it is part of life and it sucs. I want to have few pigeons and their lifespan is short too.

    • They’ll still produce, but at a lower rate that tapers down for a few additional years. And senior birds can be great teachers for new members of the flock as you bring in new girls.

      E: this seemed confrontational rather than conversational. I just hoped to give you something to consider as a value to counterbalance your expectations for them.

      • Not at all confrontational.

        We know that it slows and we decided that we will replace them one by one (we don’t want to eat chicken for straight month).

        I am mowing in 2 days from my parents house (jaj after 22 years) so it won’t be my decision. In a case of the pigeons I want to add few pairs for food (easiest way to taste them).

  • This is a very real and normal part of having rats as pets. I’m sorry you have to go through it. My partner and I nearly gave on rats after loving an oops litter for nearly 2 years then losing all 8 of them over the course of a couple months. It was just the normal time for a rat to be done being a rat, but it felt like a biblical plague. Seemed like every week I had to put another of my friends in the garden out front of the old apartment.

    While trying to figure out what to do with all this grief, we came across the myth that when a child dies, some god or another sprinkles daisies across the earth where that child lived or where they were buried. My rats occupied an interesting intersection where they were not, of course, children but they were absolutely My Babies. In light of this, we decided to get a daisy to plant over the spot where they rest, right next to one another just like they did every night when they were rats. It was an African daisy in particular, which is an annual in all but the southernmost USDA hardiness zones and will die annually basically anywhere in the US except along the southern border. We are in Pennsylvania, but somehow that African daisy has been going strong outside the old apartment for four years now. It pops beautiful flowers every summer and doesn’t show any signs of slowing down, even though the new tenant is clearly not taking care of it at all. The rational-depressive in me is thinking about climate change, but the romantic in me sees a plant being kept alive against all odds by the sheer accumulated love and silliness of 16 rat-years. My friends saying hello, and letting me know they’re okay.

    As far as giving up rats, we had decided to. We even gave away one of our three cages and were looking for homes for the other two when a breeder came across on Craigslist who had the goofiest, most beautiful pink eyed double rex beans I’d ever seen. So we hopped in the car for a couple hours drive and we’re rat parents again. The heartache is real, but it’s worth it. They’re litter mates, so odds are we’ll have a rattie mass extinction event some time in the next year or so. That’s gonna hurt a lot. But for now they’re cute, and silly and playful. They do tricks and get into mischief. We’re fortunate enough to have a spare bedroom that we’ve rat-proofed and filled with obstacles and hides and dig boxes. We even got to put little floating shelves on the wall and built them a super Mario Bros themed obstacle wall. The best part is, when they come out of the cage for enrichment time they line up at the door and everyone gives me a kiss and gets a cheerio.

  • My wife and I used to keep guinea pigs and gerbils, and I had a hedgehog for awhile, over a span of about 15 years. The last guinea pig passed in the mid-2000s.

    It was worth it, but as I near retirement, I wouldn’t do it again. I’ve had that experience, and I treasure it, but I don’t need to do it again.

  • Life will always be brief. It reminds us to focus on quality and live in the moment. Everything dies eventually, it’s the one trait we all share with every other living being and the cosmos itself.

  • One of my cats just got diagnosed with kidney disease. We caught it fairly early, but she’s 15 years old and it feels like this might be the beginning of the end. Even 15 years feels too short. As Tamsyn Muir wrote, “Life is too short, and love is too long.”