I’ve been admittedly struggling with my identity as a whole, especially as I approach my 1 year mark on Estrogen. So far it’s the right call for me, but I’ve discovered that I’m becoming more comfortable with my masculine traits and even find myself binding my breasts that I’ve waited so many years to have, while the next day I’ll do the complete opposite and present femininely.

I feel like I have no consistent sense of self and often have a hard time even knowing what’s going on in my head haha

Constantly trying to figure out if I’m a boy, girl, both, or neither, because I admittedly struggle with my body in various fronts. One day I’m too feminine, the next I look too much like a man, or I’m not androgynous enough.

Frankly, it’s exhausting. I used to think I was just a woman but it doesn’t seem to fit as I continue hrt.

It feels odd to express all of this but, I’ve not really talked to many trans people as I’m chronically shy. Is there anyone who can relate to what I’m going through?

  •  Jimbob0i0   ( @Jimbob0i0@beehaw.org ) 
    2•1 year ago

    For what it’s worth you’re not alone.

    Every day I wake up with the brain fog clearing and having to do a self check of whether I’m feeling he, they or she … and it does have a knock on effect on my mood when my presentation doesn’t match how my inner self feels.

    Also it’s not a daily “decision” for me … over the course of the day my mood can push my feelings of gender from one end of the scale to the other.