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“But I don’t know why they stopped talking to me!”
Yup. Learned real quick never to tell my mom anything, and she’s angry that I’m not doing anything with my life. I am, she just doesn’t know about it lol.
Same. I haven’t spoken with mine in years and I’ll bet she doesn’t know why. Between this and the comments about making babies that she knows I never wanted…
This is when I stopped really talking to family.
Mom disclosure agreements are one-sided.
My partner tends to do the same and I am not sure how to start this discussion. We recently had a fight about our respective ways of interacting during arguments just before they get heated and talked about it afterwards, coming to a (what I thought) somewhat satisfying conclusion on the areas we could each work on. Fast-forward about a week and by now I have overheard her tell this ‘story’ of our fight to about 5 different friends and family members on the phone, over the various days.
Like I said, I’m just not sure how to handle it - I don’t want to cut off her communication with friends. I realize sometimes you need to bounce off an idea you’re mulling over with a close friend. But I also feel there are certain private affairs I just don’t wanted chatted about to all our extended friend circle, and this is a pattern that’s repeated itself often enough now for me to recognize.
Maybe tell her ? If you don’t communicate they won’t be able to just guess
I mean yes, definitely, it’s a topic I want to broach. But since I’m not even sure myself yet on my exact feelings or wishes I find it harder to open a gentle, full discussion - especially when it may be around adjusting some fundamental relationship assumptions.
But I definitely didn’t want to make it sound like a one-sided fault, as these things rarely are.
You have a nice attitude towards our and that’s great ! Hope you’ll soon find a way to communicate this to them in a gentle way
Realistically I wanna say that your last paragraph sounds perfectly worded to broach the topic with her.
It tells her that you do not fundamentally want to isolate her, that she should be able to talk about stuff with friends but that you want some things to be private or at least have a say on how or if something gets discussed with friends.
Maybe try to frame what the deciding factor is to make something private for you as well?
I do not feel comfortable if you air out our discussions on weaknesses when those are moments where I feel we can be vulnerable and frank with each other. I just do not want to feel like I share those critical moments with all our friends and family but I want to at least have time to digest it myself. If we improve and/or it feels like we have progressed from the topic I think it is fair game but otherwise it really puts pressure on me.
Maybe something like this, if it fits what you are feeling?
But I think discussing it is the right way forward and I know how hard it can be to talk with a partner about stuff like this.
This is my dad.
I learned in my teens that anything shared with him is going to make it to the family I’m no-contact with. So, of course I’m taking lion taming classes while also teaching ESL to native aborigines and doing tattoos on children at Drag Queen Book Club.
Drag Queen Book Club?
Is that where the dude in the dress has all the kids gather around? Oh, no, wait, I’m thinking of Jesus.
Dirty fucking Lib.
I was just thinking the other day that Jesus can’t have been happy with all those prayers and sermons in Latin
If it was me, the cannibalism would cause some questions.
Is that Jim Carrey? Because I don’t know anymore.
no, I believe that’s Walton Goggins if I’m not mistaken.
I just thought I’d clarify as that’s an insult to Mr. Goggins, he looks nowhere near as bad as post-surgery Carrey.
Why did you post a blurry image of a background with text overlay…?
Walton Goggins
Deadbeat Walton Goggins actually.
Practice better OpSec…don’t reveal secrets to people who won’t keep them
