• The argument usually goes something like “okay a woman is beating on me I’m expected to just stand there and take it because if I retaliate at all I’m the aggressor somehow” like the whole “HOW CAN SHE SLAP?!?” Video where dude has like 20 Indian men come beat the fuck out of him for retaliating

    • NotAnOtter ( NotAnOtter@lemmus.org ) 
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      3 days ago

      If someone is beating on you, you should take the minnimal required action to make the beating stop which normally is just leaving but sometimes can including hitting or stabbing or shooting back.

      But you never “get to” hit them just like you never “get to” be rescued from a burning car. It’s not a privilege, it’s a last resort you hope you never need and the day that you do need it is a sad, dark day.

      • kuhli ( kuhli@lemmy.dbzer0.com ) 
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        3 days ago

        Ultimately the issue is there’s two things people are talking about:

        • Occasional situations when a man has to use self defense against a woman and is viewed as the perpetrator
        • Guys being way to excited to assault someone

        And people just talking past each other without being clear about which theyre talking about or disguising one as the other

      • r1veRRR ( r1veRRR@feddit.org ) 
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        2 days ago

        The essential point is simply that what counts as minimal or reasonable force is entirely, and completely differently judged by society at large, including other women, when a woman does it to a man or vice versa.

        Yes, use minimal. But also, be consistent about what you consider minimal. A bunch of people, feminists even, would be totally fine with a woman physically assaulting (slapping) a man if he says something bad to her. The same people would never allow a man to do the same, no matter what the woman says.

        • NotAnOtter ( NotAnOtter@lemmus.org ) 
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          2 days ago

          would be totally fine with a woman physically assaulting (slapping) a man if he says something bad to her

          Yeah well those people are idiots. And also this feels like a strawman. It is obvious that walking away is a lesser action than hitting someone, and it is obvious that walking away would cause the verbal abuse to ‘stop’ in the sense that you would no longer hear it.

        • velma ( velma@sh.itjust.works ) 
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          2 days ago

          A bunch of people, feminists even, would be totally fine with a woman physically assaulting (slapping) a man if he says something bad to her. The same people would never allow a man to do the same, no matter what the woman says.

          What a lovely strawman you’ve constructed to bash feminists.

      • zarkanian ( zarkanian@sh.itjust.works ) 
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        3 days ago

        He almost got killed! To make it even more bizarre, the assailants were all yelling insults about the guy’s sister, like “Your sister is a whore!” Apparently, if you want to insult somebody in India, you say bad things about their sister.