I had everything figured out when I started HRT. I knew at what point my mediocre health insurance would pay for part of various procedures. I could put pins in different points on the timeline and tell myself, “ok, once I’m here, I should be comfortable with x, y, and z and out in these spheres of my life”. Things like that.

Now I’m coming up on 6 months in and there are days when I just feel like I’m gonna go insane. Like, how did I ever think I was going to stay not-out to most of the world for a year of this? When I’m at home and I can girlmode a bit, things are OK, but holy shit boymode at work and in the hyper-male atmosphere in some of my hobbies is just killing me. Mirrors get progressively worse. My patience seems almost nonexistent. I start daydreaming of just ripping my face off, or researching shoulder width reductions.

Obviously I wasn’t ready for any of this. Did other folks run into this? How do you stay afloat?