- Track_Shovel ( @Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net ) English54•1 year ago
I think a lot for the guys that follow these morons and buy into this culture did not have positive male role models growing up, thus turn to media for some guidance.
This does not excuse their conduct or self-delusion, but does explain why it happens.
- PorkRollWobbly ( @ComradePorkRoll@lemmy.ml ) 40•1 year ago
They are victims as much as they are villains.
- Track_Shovel ( @Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net ) English19•1 year ago
Very much so, which makes it all that more sad.
I’m in no way excusing their villanry, but most are so delusional that they won’t ever take a hard look at the way they are and wonder if they could be something else or if they need to change
- zwekihoyy ( @zwekihoyy@lemmy.ml ) 4•1 year ago
this doesn’t mean much tho, considering people aren’t ever born ‘villains’. they all are created by something traumatic.
so sure, empathize all you want, but it doesn’t help anyone. simply enables it.
- PorkRollWobbly ( @ComradePorkRoll@lemmy.ml ) 3•1 year ago
I think it does help in that we can approach our ridicule of them from a constructive manner.
“Your role models are taking advantage of you.”
“At least I don’t fail to hide my insecurities behind toxic masculinity.”
“You’re alone because you choose to be alone.”
- Rozaŭtuno ( @Rozauhtuno@lemmy.blahaj.zone ) 8•1 year ago
They also never grew out of high school mentality.
- GreatGrapeApe ( @GreatGrapeApe@reddthat.com ) 43•1 year ago
Don’t forget has never assessed what they have to offer, nor do they make efforts to improve.
And if they do have something to offer it’s “you only want me for my status and money.”
- DessertStorms ( @DessertStorms@kbin.social ) 28•1 year ago
No, these people were always sexist, that’s why it’s so easy to hook them on this bullshit.
We are all socialised with misogyny (as well as cis-heteronormativity) literally from infancy (and those of us who are directly impacted sadly internalise them to a depressing degree), and that’s when we need to start fighting against it, not only once the misogynists turn violent (verbally as well as physically), it’s too late at that point (even if they can be deradicalized the damage they did is already done).
- PrunesMakeYouPoop ( @PrunesMakeYouPoop@kbin.social ) 14•1 year ago
That is not necessarily true. People can and do change. Darth Vader was not born evil, after all.
- irmoz ( @irmoz@reddthat.com ) 11•1 year ago
Darth Vader is not real.
- Track_Shovel ( @Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net ) English6•1 year ago
How insightful PrunesMakeYouPoop
- stillwater ( @stillwater@lemm.ee ) English2•1 year ago
The person you’re replying to is advocating for encouraging change.
- zer0nix ( @zer0nix@lemm.ee ) 1•1 year ago
I don’t know about sexist but I imagine they always had the defect in their brain that causes them to be inconsiderate and difficult
- ChiwaWithMujicanoHat ( @Xel@mujico.org ) 27•1 year ago
My kitchen YouTube feed randomly showed me a “Rachel Zegler criticism” video and I was curious so I put it while cooking.
It was basically a 40 min rant where some YouTuber was showing her hypocrisy because she said Hollywood needs more representation from latinos even though she was acting on a movie as a puerto rican. The video could have been 2 minutes long but I noticed it was mostly the guy criticising every single word she’s said and telling you how to feel about it.
I checked YouTube the next day and now it’s full of alt right channels, for context I mostly watch veritasium, audit the Audit, science podcasts, dw documentaries, kurzgesagt and some music videos, I rarely watch political stuff on that account and yet now I see Ben Shapiro, Piers Morgan, Andrew Tate, Steven Crowder and the likes, literally my whole front page was just them and my automatic queue would be increasingly alt right shit.
I clicked on not interested and don’t recommend this channel and yet I constantly see the videos showing up in the front page.
I think YouTube is heavily pushing this type of content, even if you try to show the algorithm that you are not interested. They probably see that it makes people get more engaged with the platform so they are okay with radicalizing everyone just for profit.
- foo ( @foo@programming.dev ) 5•1 year ago
I think you tubes algorithm looks for things that are new to you and then loads you up on that. For example, I had an event that has caused my tinnitus to spike and I found a 10 hour video to listen to while I work that helps mask it. Now my entire fucking feed is overrun by different coloured noises and quack/chiropractors telling me to pull my ears to heal my tomorrow
- gothicdecadence ( @gothicdecadence@lemm.ee ) 5•1 year ago
If you delete the video you watched it should help
- winter ( @winter@slrpnk.net ) 1•1 year ago
Dalas, ¿verdad? Tiene el poder de hacer parecer razonables sus palabras para gente ignorante, aunque sean basura
- db2 ( @db2@sopuli.xyz ) 22•1 year ago
The funniest thing about Andrew Tate is he’s so obviously overcompensating for being gay. I mean funny weird, it would be funny ha ha if he weren’t also a manipulative kidnapping rapist and grifter.
- GreatGrapeApe ( @GreatGrapeApe@reddthat.com ) 4•1 year ago
What makes you think he is gay?
- blindbunny ( @blindbunny@lemmy.ml ) English13•1 year ago
The way he invites smaller men over to look at him in his boxers and fawn over him. I’m bi so it’s kinda hot not gonna lie.
- GreatGrapeApe ( @GreatGrapeApe@reddthat.com ) 7•1 year ago
That might be a weird form of narcissism though.
- blindbunny ( @blindbunny@lemmy.ml ) English7•1 year ago
You know the two aren’t mutually exclusive?
- GreatGrapeApe ( @GreatGrapeApe@reddthat.com ) 6•1 year ago
True but it might mean he isn’t gay. I would be more inclined to think he gets off on the approval and admiration from anyone vs wanting sexual or romantic relationships with other men.
- kingthrillgore ( @KingThrillgore@lemmy.ml ) 7•1 year ago
He did a video of him and some dude playing Chess in his undies.
I play both sides of the fence, I have seen some hot femboy on femboy action, and I swear right hand to God that Andrew Tate video is the gayest thing I’ve ever seen. It’s gayer than 8 dudes blowing 9 dudes. I was ready to go back to women after seeing the THUMBNAIL of it. It’s that bad.
Even now I’m having Akira flashbacks of this video and the damage it’s done to me and god knows who else. Also, they can’t play chess. Neither can I but he definitely can’t.
And he’s a repulsive human being.
- GreatGrapeApe ( @GreatGrapeApe@reddthat.com ) 2•1 year ago
Sad that he can’t play chess given his father was a grandmaster
- Hovenko ( @Hovenko@iusearchlinux.fyi ) 3•1 year ago
Nope, the funniest is his absent chin being desperately covered by suboptimal … whatever grows on it.
- jherazob ( @jherazob@beehaw.org ) English22•1 year ago
People only offer derision towards people who fall for this (which is absolutely reasonable), but only a few see it as the fucking tragedy it is, no one gives a fucking shit about young men and their issues or gives them support, who are then taken wholesale by THESE bastards and turned into incels and/or nazis, had young men had any support from decent people we might have less people on the side of the bastards
- nudny ekscentryk ( @nudnyekscentryk@szmer.info ) English14•1 year ago
bullshit. hating the world is just the easy way out, admitting you yourself are wrong is simply harder.
- Malta Soron ( @maltasoron@sopuli.xyz ) 13•1 year ago
I’ve stopped believing that. I think there’s plenty of support for them online; people like Mark Manson have been putting out great stuff for years. (His writings helped me through a lot of stuff.)
I think the main problem is that improving yourself requires admitting that you were wrong about some things, and apparently that’s really hard to do for some people. Easier to blame it on the rest of society.
- vacuumflower ( @vacuumflower@lemmy.sdf.org ) 4•1 year ago
Usually if something is as easy for another person as it is for you, then they’ve been as successful in it as you have. That’s all I have to say about your readiness to judge others with that implication that you are better.
Ah, actually visited that link of yours, clicked through one article and it does look good. The only catch is that I’m confident most people with such problems haven’t ever heard about this guy and his website.
- Malta Soron ( @maltasoron@sopuli.xyz ) 1•1 year ago
Fair enough. I didn’t mean to say it was easy. Took me about eight years to realise I needed to work on myself, and then a few more to actually do so . Back then pick-up artists were still a major thing, so I learned and then had to unlearn all that bullshit.
However, things won’t get better if we’re treating young men as poor, helpless victims of society and the YouTube algorithm, instead of treating them like, you know, men, and telling them to take responsibility for their lives and online habits. It’s just the same victim complex with a new narrative.
One of my favourite movies/books is Fight Club, because it takes this societal dissatisfaction and tells you to get over it by working on yourself. You’re not a victim, because you still have the power to change yourself. (Of course, the whole descent into violent madness isn’t something to aspire.) I feel that notion is sorely absent in this discussion.
- vacuumflower ( @vacuumflower@lemmy.sdf.org ) 2•1 year ago
Back then pick-up artists were still a major thing, so I learned and then had to unlearn all that bullshit.
Oh. Thank dear god I never tried.
However, things won’t get better if we’re treating young men as poor, helpless victims of society
They are usually victims of their own parents, who may have too differing behavior from what is common average (say, example 1) both asexual and thus treating nonverbal communication as something not very hard or important, and thinking that you’ll just learn it, or, example 2) too sexual, like, sorry, one of the parents being an ex-escort and thus their child incorrectly measuring the signals sent, or, example 3) both parents having grown with their mother only or with little attention from their father, thus again not learning the skills of communication for men, one can imagine other examples).
instead of treating them like, you know, men, and telling them to take responsibility for their lives and online habits
Responsibility is fine for most, not knowing what to do is a different matter.
You’re not a victim, because you still have the power to change yourself.
That’s a philosophical question. You may have noticed that what you eat and how you exercise physically and what news you hear and what people tell you all affect very much what you think and how. So whether you can consciously change yourself to some intended end is, again, a question.
- sculd ( @sculd@beehaw.org ) 4•1 year ago
There are PLENTY of people who cares about young men. Many of them are just in REAL LIFE not on the internet.
Teachers and social workers at schools, classmates (yes, you can make friends with real people too.), FAMILY. Even if all that fails, many, many NGOs need more hands and would welcome any young men willing to volunteer. They just need to go there IN REAL LIFE.
- vacuumflower ( @vacuumflower@lemmy.sdf.org ) 2•1 year ago
Thank you for being reasonable.
- Katrisia ( @Katrisia@lemm.ee ) 2•1 year ago
Some areas or fields have a difficult time reaching men, including young men, and it’s not because they are not wanted. Let’s take psychiatry, for example. Many people already believe psychiatry is nonsense; add to this the common idea that psychiatric treatment is for cowards—and that cowardice is mostly for women (because women can be many bad things, but men can’t)—, and that’s a recipe for men scoffing at the idea of visiting a psychiatrist (and a psychotherapist, by extension).
I’ve also heard people complaining about a lack of role models, but there are excellent role models. I hope I am not wrong about them, but I admire Stephen Fry, John Oliver, Keanu Reeves, Bill Nye… I also like many small influencers. Some of them talk about being a man with great insight, such as @watchfulcoyote on TikTok.
I cannot say with certainty how free these radicalized young men were to choose a better path than the one they are on, and it probably varies from case to case, but I know there were and are normal and decent people watching out for them.
- socsa ( @socsa@lemmy.ml ) 1•1 year ago
As a young man, I found plenty of support in a variety of places. You just have to take a very small leap of faith and reject the asshole energy.
- Blackmist ( @Blackmist@feddit.uk ) English15•1 year ago
It’s like Cosmo and their awful sex tips for women.
Keep them single, they’ll keep coming back to you.
- Emerald ( @peter@lemmy.emerald.show ) 13•1 year ago
We need a starterpacks community!
- Mothra ( @Mothra@mander.xyz ) 7•1 year ago
Who are these two high value men (lol) next to Tate and the other one with the selfie?
- beteljuice ( @beteljuice@lemmy.ml ) 5•1 year ago
What a bunch of freemales
- ComradeSharkfucker ( @sharkfucker420@lemmy.ml ) 5•1 year ago
God why is dmt lumped in with these idiots
- kingthrillgore ( @KingThrillgore@lemmy.ml ) 5•1 year ago
With role models like this, This guy is a small life crisis away from “can you spare a crumb of pussy” to “does this rag smell like ether”
- dingleberry ( @dingleberry@discuss.tchncs.de ) 3•1 year ago
Kermit the sexist philosopher.
- Hovenko ( @Hovenko@iusearchlinux.fyi ) 2•1 year ago
You mean incels
- 91x ( @91x@lemmy.sdf.org ) English1•1 year ago
I sorta get most of it but what’s the significance of “CEO,OOO,OOO” besides being a bad t-shirt you buy on the boardwalk?