• Sometimes it’s weird to look back on middle school, and the teachers who brought our generation up as young kids being told about the future. I’m an adult now, and I feel like an adult now, but in a way it feels like I’m still a part of that group of dumb and naive kids. It doesn’t feel that long ago at all. But the reality is that all of us are now pushing 40, and our time there is now wholly irrelevant, and we’re so far removed from those years that it’s fucking wild. A lot of those teachers are probably dead now.

    I don’t know how to articulate what it is I’m meaning to say here. It’s just weird that we were kids so recently. I don’t feel like my life has gone by all that fast, but middle school to 40 somehow did all the same. I feel my age, and I feel as though I’ve lived to my age, but my memories don’t feel distant whatsoever. It feels like that was nine years ago.

    Just like I feel like I was still living at home with my dad a few years ago, but I’ve been living in another country away from my parents for 7 years now, and my dad had been dead since last May.

    He was such a good dad.

    • Condolences for your dad. 42 here, my dad is showing his age majorly now.

      Looking back I know I lived every single hour but huge leaps of time are just gone. Like, entire jobs I worked for years I have maybe a half dozen memories. On top of that our work product is gone, the company is gone, the building is gone, the entire industry is changed… it’s like it was all a dream. I definitely understand the old man looking at a city and saying, “this was all orchards”. I used to think it was a wistful phrase, but it’s also an expression of disbelief. When we were embedded it all seemed so important. But it all shuffled off with zero fanfare. It really changes how you experience life, and that’s how I “feel old”.