I’ve realized that I’m very mentally weak and it’s impacting my success.
I suspect I have ADHD and whenever I get an urge to distract myself, I rarely manage to resist it.
I think what I am missing is the residtance to discomfort that eg. allows sports people to carry on going even when their muscles are telling them to stop. Or the thing that allows people to defy themselves and step into an ice-cold shower.
Unfortunately I am not a person who enjoys sports and a cold shower is only something that makes sense once a day. Can you think of any exercises that I can do here and now in my room, and practice routinely that will strengthen my willpower so that I can better resist my urges in the future?
Start with something small that you don’t like doing and then do it anyways. You could try things like the 10min rule (do the thing but only for 10min) which makes it easier to fit it in and also “its just for 10min” can be a powerful way to trick your mind.
When I say small, I mean real small. The last thing you want to do is set a medium sized goal and fail at it. That will just demoralize you further. Try putting skittles or a small candy that you like in a bowl in a high foot traffic area. You will be tempted to take some everytime you walk by, but DON’T!! each time you walk by its you building more and more discipline and willpower.
Also don’t beat yourself up if you fail. Harder said than done, but the phrase “be hard on problems and soft on people” also applies to yourself. Hold yourself accountable but also be kind to yourself in moments of weakness.
Other mentioned prep and I agree. Willpower and discipline are more abundant when you’re well rested and not hungry. So if its weight loss you’re working on, then don’t grocery shop hungry. If its working out, then make sure you’re getting your rest.
Its never going to be a constant series of wins, there will be losses and moments of weakness, its part of the process and you just brush yourself off, reset, take any lessons from the loss, get back into it.
You’ve got this.
That 10 minute rule is phenomenal. I’ll be stood there looking at the kitchen full of washing up from dinner, wanting to just go to bed, but I’ll set a ten minute timer on Alexa and suddenly the kitchen is tidy before the alarm goes off. Works every damn time. And even if I’m still tidying when the timer finishes, I’ll just keep going.
As a side note: I’m also struggling with this. A lot of us in the comments are or were at some point. So my words are also for myself. So ya, We’ve got this.