This question is a joke. Also, the mods should add a joke tag to allow dumb answers.

  • there are stories that in the Councils to determine which gospels to include in the New Testament, one of the first gospels to be deemed heretical was one where Jesus argued against the establishment of a church …

      • heads up, there’s a reason I labeled them “stories” (certainly not something you can confirm through the church) – most of the stories come up as “secret knowledge” within the various esoteric/hermetic/gnostic sects and usually make reference to the Gospel of Mary Magdalene

        • possibilities include
          • most likely, Gospel of Mary, part of the Berlin Codex – somewhere between 100 and 150 CE maybe
          • less likely, Dialogue of the Saviour, part of the Nag Hammadi library – maybe 150 CE
        • two main councils for determining the New Testament (and remember they didn’t have carbon dating to determine authenticity)
        • we do know
          • the 12 disciples were sexist
          • Mary Magdalene was a single noble lady – a perfect target for misogynistic slander painting her as a prostitute
        • Wait, does your story include that the council found it preferable to say the Son of God, King of the Jews, legitimate heir of King David, hangs out with a prostitute than with a noble woman?

          • more insipid than that – that he would rather spend time with her instead of his “best buds” was clearly not right, so she must’ve been cheating – and if she was a proper woman, she would’ve been married already, something must be wrong with her …