Edit 2: @HornyMiisha@lemmy.blahaj.zone now!

Edit 3: not again…

I’m sorry… I think it’s me who triggered this by worrying about her so much (I won’t why but it’s not life-threatening) I messaged her on Lemmy (she’s not online on Matrix), making her open a chat which we last used…

CW: self-harm

…when she had suicidal thoughts and as the police suggested I pretended to want to come so I could make them do a wellness check… ultimately did make her less willing to die but not nice of me

At least nobody (not even the police, who didn’t ask for her username) but me (who she accidentally sent her name to) knows her real name in connection with the Lemmy and Matrix accounts, so she technically wasn’t doxxed; the police didn’t tell me the address they found in their database of course.

By the way, the police here is generally nice, if incompetent at times, and would use Miisha’s legal (female) name. It’s not like I sent a SWAT team.

Edit: Miisha insists this was not why she deleted her account. It’s clear she was already in distress* so I’d say I wasn’t the only factor but given the timing, it was probably the last straw

* Edit: this is the situation in question

So yeah, @Miisha@lemmy.blahaj.zone saw a sad chat, didn’t want to see it ever again and went the way of @AnxiousMiisha@lemmy.blahaj.zone :( at least her posts and comments are still visible

      • Malica ( Malica@lemmy.zip ) English
        3·
        2 days ago

        It’s always the right thing to be cautious I think, I’m sure most of us that have been in crisis know you don’t think clearly and something terrible could happen. I’m glad the police aren’t evil over there like they are here.

  • velma ( velma@sh.itjust.works ) English
    42·
    3 days ago

    I would have been quite upset at the potential of being doxxed that way. I think she had asked you to stop worrying after her as well.

    Well. I hope she feels comfortable coming back under a different account.

  • McUberStein ( McUberStein@lemmy.zip ) English
    18·
    3 days ago

    This isn’t because of you. This has nothing to do with what you did, even tho it was mean.

    It’s because of me. My pretentious support of women’s rights while spewing blatant misogyny, erasing the experiences of non-trans gender-nonconforming people, spreading right-wing propaganda, absolutely annoying people who just want clean and readable feeds, basically forcing my obnoxious personality into every nook and cranny of this place. It’s all on me.

    So sorry, but it’s better this way. Being overdramatic is just my style so just writing this is proof of my extreme arrogance. I enjoyed my time here. Thanks you all.

    • SectoidLexi ( SectoidLexi@lemmy.blahaj.zone ) 
      English
      2·
      1 day ago

      Hey I know we don’t know each other but from everything I’ve seen from your posts I think you’re wonderful and are being too harsh on yourself. Transfems are regularly pressured into silencing themselves and to make themselves smaller for other people’s comfort. I hope things get better for you and that you can experience more moments of joy like you brought to us with your presence.

    • ChaoticNeutralCzech ( ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.org ) OPEnglish
      21·
      2 days ago

      Everyone enjoys you here, Miisha. I’m glad this trouble in your life right now* is not as serious as I thought and I hope you’ll be back doing what folks loved you for. You don’t need to post that often either: do what’s comfortable and sustainable.

      * Edit: this is the situation in question

    • Impound4017 ( Impound4017@sh.itjust.works ) English
      18·
      3 days ago

      NOOOOOOOO

      Nah but for real (just for your general fund of information) I’ve enjoyed all your posts; your memes bang, and I hope you’re doing alright. Truly, if people on Lemmy wanted something sanitized, then they should’ve stayed in the padded, corporate white walls of Reddit, and if someone doesn’t like your content, then they can damn well block you. It’s barely even an inconvenience.

      It isn’t obnoxious for you to live your truth, nor to post about it. It isn’t arrogant to be known, nor to be missed, which you will be.

    • velma ( velma@sh.itjust.works ) English
      18·
      3 days ago

      Hey fuck off.

      My pretentious support of women’s rights while spewing blatant misogyny, erasing the experiences of non-trans gender-nonconforming people, spreading right-wing propaganda, absolutely annoying people who just want clean and readable feeds, basically forcing my obnoxious personality into every nook and cranny of this place.

      That’s not what Miisha was doing.

    • Banana ( Banana@sh.itjust.works ) English
      15·
      3 days ago

      Hey, love, I barely know you, but I wanted to let you know that my impressions of you have been nothing but positive.

      Now stop bein so mean to our friend (you) ❤️

      come back if/when you are ready, but if it isn’t good for your mental health, please prioritize and take care of yourself.

    • Mustelidae (she/her) ( sneaky_mustelidae@lemmy.blahaj.zone ) English
      15·
      3 days ago

      Love, you’re in no way what you describe here, not to me and likely not to many others here.

      While I would gladly go to sleep to never wake up again, I enjoy interacting with you and your posts.

      Sis, you’re loved, you can get to your lovely otter for ears, hugs and paws.

    • Hildegard (she/her) ( hildegarde@lemmy.blahaj.zone ) English
      13·
      3 days ago

      Miisha, we love you we care about you. Its a relief to hear you’re doing all right. I love your posts, and your self assessment is very off base. It may have been a little too much all at once, but we love having you here.

      Given the state of the world, I get very worried when trans people disappear without explanation. You don’t have to stay here if this community is not best for you, but if you leave please at least leave a note saying you’re fine. I don’t want to have to worry about you but I can’t help it.

    • luciole (they/them) ( luciole@beehaw.org ) English
      8·
      2 days ago

      Misha, sis. I wish I could lift this veil in front of your eyes and make you see how much life and humanity you breath into the community. People who want clean and readable feeds can go fly a kite, this isn’t a billionaire-owned newsroom. This is a place shock full of queer, messy, flawed, amazing, radiant people and there’s a seat with your name on it. I hope I’ll see you wreck this feed silly many times again. Whatever you ultimately decide, take care of yourself.

    • socsa ( socsa@piefed.social ) English
      11·
      3 days ago

      Haters gonna hate tbh. Any time you put yourself out there. I enjoyed your manic posting spree. People burn accounts for worse reasons though so o7

    • MrQuallzin ( MrQuallzin@pie.eyeofthestorm.place ) English
      10·
      3 days ago

      As someone currently learning more about herself, seeing your posts has been nothing but sunshine these last few days! The world is full of haters, I’m so sorry people are pushing you to think that you’ve been doing something wrong.

    • anotterinthewild ( anotterinthewild@lemmy.blahaj.zone ) English
      5·
      2 days ago

      Hey girl, I’m just a random soul lurking around without posting (this is actually my first comment here) but I wanted to say that I really enjoyed your posts.

      I know life can be a bitch and everything can seem dark. I just wanted to put my little stone here and say that a random trans girl likes what you did, the joy you bring here and maybe a little touch of chaos too ;)

      Be yourself, that’s the most important and take all the time you need to feel better!

      Love from a stranger <3

    • SpacePanda ( SpacePanda@leminal.space ) English
      9·
      2 days ago

      Miisha I dont know you, but, through seeing your interactions with others and your amazing meme dump. I even stalked your page for more memes. I promise, you are being too hard on yourself babes. We all love you here.

  • Hildegard (she/her) ( hildegarde@lemmy.blahaj.zone ) English
    10·
    3 days ago

    Some of the last comments I heard from her were concerning, so I think you were right to try and reach out. I worry about her. Given what I’ve heard so far, I don’t think you should blame yourself for her deleting her account once again.

    Miisha take care of yourself, be kind to yourself. ❤️❤️❤️❤️

  • Apytele ( Apytele@sh.itjust.works ) English
    6·
    2 days ago

    Yeah from a provider of inpatient care, it sucks. It’ll keep you alive if your other option is death buuut…

    Since you do know her name / where she is here’s my recs:

    ~3x T-shirts

    ~3x Shorts / pants that will stay up without a drawstring

    A sweater without strings or a hood

    Warm fuzzy slippers with a soft but grippy bottom.

    books - Make sure they’re paperbacks bound with glue, not spiral or staples:

    • a plain notebook
    • 1-2 fiction or nonfiction according to preference (softcore smut is probably fine as long as it’s not apparent on the cover)
    • an adult coloring book
    • if you can find it a paint by sticker book would be perfect
    • a box of crayons without a sharpener (they miiight allow markers / colored pencils but even if she wound up on the absolute highest possible self injury precautions crayons would still be fine).
    • a pack of cards

    If she normally wears wigs get her a bouffant bonnet with an elastic band / no ties.

    Will add anything else I think of.

    • ChaoticNeutralCzech ( ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.org ) OPEnglish
      2·
      2 days ago

      Ngl, I’ve been to a psych ward for lesser problems, and it was a rather uncomfortable but quite effective way to resolve the pressing issues, but there are several more or less legitimate reasons she doesn’t want to go, or would use her free will to leave. Caring for her BF with a vertebrae fracture, for example…

      Anyway, if you want help with a list…

      • Blåhaj or other emotional support plushie
      • MP3 player (no video playback or games) or pocket radio
        • ideally rechargeable from USB-A without a cable, otherwise it can only be recharged at the nurse office; puny wired headphones are allowed; non-rechargeable models may be problematic due to springs in the battery compartment but those can be cut and replaced with sheet metal alternatives or even something like aluminium foil ball if need be
      • Hobby supplies
        • see if you have a hobby you’ve maybe “grown out of” or put on hold that can be done within the institution’s restrictions (low-tech, no ropes, wires, sharp edges or heavy blunt objects). Reading, writing, drawing etc. you mentioned but there can be other options like Rubik’s cube, large jigsaw puzzles, origami, or making elastic band bracelets, all of which were enjoyed at the teens’ clinic I stayed at. There was a piano and a then-recent offline games console available during some hours, too. Under staff supervision, there are more options: pencils can be sharpened, devices with cables charged and paper model outlines cut out, for example.

      BTW “crayons” in Europe usually refers to colored pencils, allowed in the low-security department I stayed at. There are other options that don’t get dangerously sharp: wax crayons (eww), color-core-in-thin-plastic-coating (once made by Progresso, not sure about modern alternatives), or Koh-i-noor art set with hexagonal translucent plastic shells and all-plastic advancing mechanism.